BEST PLACE TO FEEL BETTER ABOUT YOUR OWN DRINKING PROBLEM
The Blinker
There's no shortage of St. Petersburg watering holes whose regulars make your increasingly frequent weeknights out seem like a minor lifestyle glitch in comparison. But according to Peterson and Riggs, this little dive near where the South Side gives way to Gulfport takes the rum cake.
"It's where the people our parents' ages who are hardcore drunks go," says Riggs. "It's really fucked up."
Coming from a couple of ladies who single-handedly turned downtown's Emerald Bar from a homeless haven to a hipster hangout — and who considered the once-notorious Pelican Pub a prime location for people-watching — that's both a backhanded compliment and a truly frightening proposition.
So how bad is it?
"It's the only place I've feared for my life," Riggs says.
The Blinker, 2222 49th St. S., St. Petersburg, 727-323-0279.
BEST MASS LACK OF FASHION SENSE
Any Dave Matthews Cover Band show
"It's neither good nor bad. It's just like, no sense," says Riggs of the sartorial choices displayed by the licensed DMB tribute act's crowd. She oughta know; Riggs often works the merchandise booth at St. Pete's Jannus Landing where the Dave Matthews Cover Band plays all of their frequent Bay area appearances. "Every time I work one of 'em, I complain for days about how bad it was."
BEST PLACE TO SNEAK IN FOR FREE
The Emerald Bar
"Anybody in the know knows that," says Peterson.
So why is it the best?
"Because you never get caught," she replies with a laugh.
The cozy downtown St. Pete bar for years catered to a small, older clientele, often closing for the night before the State Theatre a block up Central Avenue opened its doors. A couple of years ago, however, Peterson and Riggs charmed the bar's owner into letting them throw their annual Christmas party there, complete with high-volume punk bands and more than a hundred of their closest friends. The place has been a scene mainstay ever since, but bands who want to make money must provide their own personnel to enforce a cover charge at the door. It usually comes in the form of a green and easily distracted young friend, and regulars have long since devised ways to avoid paying.
"Everybody we know sneaks in for free," Peterson confirms.
The Emerald, 550 Central Ave., St. Petersburg, 727-898-6054.
BEST BIG SHOW
X at Jannus Landing, June 7
"Why? Because they're fuckin' X and they rock," says Peterson. "Smultzy new-school punk and emo bands owe their lives to X."
BEST CHEAP EATS
Casa Cortez's 99-Cent Taco Tuesdays
Gulfport's unassuming hole-in-the-wall Mexican joint has always provided palatable fare at low prices, but the Tuesday night special has recently become a favorite of South Pinellas' young and broke fringe-culture set.
"It has turned into the punk rock cheap-eats tradition," Riggs reports.
It's a perfect place for it — the restaurant's old building and barely decorated environs evince a certain Spartan, urban-decay charm.
"And it's fun to see the waitress race around," Peterson adds.
Casa Cortez, 3128 Beach Blvd., Gulfport, 727-321-6523.
BEST HANGOVER BREAKFAST
Munch's
The ladies sing the praises of this South St. Pete institution, noting its "endless variety of tasty, greasy goodies to help you regain your strength." They reserve particular kudos for veteran waitress Debbie: "When you're a regular, your extra large glass of fresh, ice cold tea appears before you," says Peterson. "You'll know what [special or menu item] is on and what's off, and how the action was at Don's Irish Pub the night before."
Munch's, 3920 Sixth St. S., St. Petersburg, 727-896-5972.
BEST SHOPPING
Downtown St. Petersburg
Good ol' downtown St. Pete is still the best. Now there's even more variety; you got your high-end Beach Drive boutiques, and you have amazingly eclectic independent emporiums with crap you really just can't get at the SuperCenter.
BEST PLACE NOT TO GO
BayWalk Plaza
As independent storeowners who love and nurture that wonderfully eccentric stretch of downtown St. Pete that hasn't yet fallen prey to somebody's idea of commercial-zoning improvement, Mimi and Susan are particularly dismissive of BayWalk's rich folks' mall-meets-Busch Gardens architectural contrivances. "I don't have anything to say about that stuff down there," says Peterson.
Riggs is more succinct: "That place is shite."
BayWalk, 189 Second Ave. N., St. Petersburg.
BEST REASON TO TEAR DOWN FUNKY OLD HOTELS AND FLOPHOUSES, ALFRED WHITTED AIRPORT AND BAYFRONT ARENA
Luxury Townhome Condos!
Hey, rich people gotta have a nice place to live, too!
BEST PLACE TO NOT FIND WHAT YOU'RE LOOKING FOR
Asylum Sights and Sounds
There was a time when this independent West St. Pete shop held its own with Tampa's Vinyl Fever and late, great Alternative Records as one of the Bay area's best record stores. A series of employee turnovers and increased emphasis on plying various kitschy lifestyle accoutrements, however, have caused many former regulars to search elsewhere for what they need.
"They've got the worst selection, and nobody working there knows what they're doing except [manager and very cool guy] John [Harris] and his daughter," says Riggs, a former employee.
"I don't even bother going in anymore. I see stuff that was there when I was working there in '98 that hasn't been marked down — bands that never made another record. The whole store has lost its atmosphere."
Asylum Sights and Sounds, 6566 Central Ave., St. Petersburg, 727-384-1221.
BEST UNSUNG HEROES OF LOCAL MUSIC
Dream Window
For their hand-drawn and -colored, politically relevant show posters. For their loyalty to Dave's Aqua Lounge, which deserves its own category for Best Audience Participation/Fucked-Up Dancers. For their dedication to keeping prog-rock alive, and their amazing live performances.
Uh … huh.
This article appears in Sep 25 – Oct 1, 2003.