Realtor, 29, and “marketing whiz” at KForce, 25, Tampa
Met: At Green Lemon
Together: 3 years
The story: After midnight on Gasparilla is an ugly time to be at a bar. It’s a lot like pre-school. The floors are sticky, there’s a lot of yelling and there’s a good chance someone is going to wet the bed when they get home. To make it to 4 p.m. after a morning of shotgunning beers and gulps of Fireball is impressive, but midnight is a whole other animal.
Unlike most Tampanians, I don’t own a closet full of pirate costumes. There’s no fluffy shirts, beads or buccaneer hats, so I generally have to get creative on Tampa’s most infamous holiday. This year was no exception. I opted for a Hawaiian shirt, a long curly blond wig and an American flag sweatband. Somehow I blended.
The entire day my friends and I had been playing Master P’s “Make Em Say Ugh” on our phones and singing the chorus along the parade route (“Na Na Na Na”). I was fond of No Limit Soldier Mia X’s heavy intro where she belts out “Forget the Baby Boys… I’M THE BIGGEST MAMA MIA.”
At 6'3", 230 lbs, I’m usually one of the The Biggest “MAMA MIAs” in the bar, so I just kept yelling the obscure phrase and whipping around my blonde wig inside The Green Lemon restaurant. After 14 hours of stumbling around drinking, it seemed appropriate.
“I’m the biggest MAMA MIA.”
Naturally, it grabbed the attention of some other patrons. In particular, an absolutely drop-dead gorgeous woman in a tight red mini-dress and high heels. With green eyes!! Holy Smokes. She complimented my wig and I explained the Mama Mia reference and she laughed. We took a selfie that she put on SnapChat with the text “My New Boyfriend” below it. She was being ironic, but I was still flattered.
Before leaving the bar, I asked for a kiss on the cheek and she obliged. Drunk and seeing my opportunity, I turned my face a moment before her lips could hit my cheek and we locked lips. A childish trick, executed with perfection!
It wasn’t the magical type of kiss you see in movies, since some wig hair got in the way, and she pretty much pushed me off laughing and said it was a nice try, but our first kiss was memorable and I stumbled out of the bar as one happy Mama Mia.
Since then, we’ve spent every Gasparilla together and we use it as our anniversary.
Na Na Na Na.
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