Dirty Talk: Infamous Quotes on Sex and Love

An expanding list of funny, irreverent, truthful, and memorable quotes on sex, love, and everything in between.

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Ayn Rand: "To say 'I love you' one must first be able to say the 'I.'"

Peter Redgrove: “We rehearse for the big death through the little death of orgasm, through erotic living. Death as transfiguration.”

Francois de La Rochefoucauld: "Absence diminishes mediocre passions and increases great ones, as the wind extinguishes candles and fans fires."

Joan Rivers: “I blame my mother for my poor sex life. All she told me was, 'The man goes on top and the woman underneath.' For three years my husband and I slept on bunk beds.”

Joan Rivers: “I'm a double bagger. Not only does my husband put a bag over my face when we're making love, but he also puts a bag over his head in case mine falls off.”

Joan Rivers: “My best birth control now is to leave the lights on.”

Joan Rivers: “A man can sleep around, no questions asked, but if a woman makes nineteen or twenty mistakes she's a tramp.”

Mary Roach: “Hormones are nature's three bottles of beer.”

Tom Robbins: “We waste time looking for the perfect lover, instead of creating the perfect love.”

Francois de La Rochefoucauld: "True love is like ghosts, which everyone talks about and few have seen."

Scott Roeben: “I'm a terrible lover. I've actually given a woman an anti-climax.”

Scott Roeben: “I once went on a date and asked the woman if she'd brought any protection. She pulled a switchblade on me.”

Betty Rollin: “Scratch most feminists and underneath there is a woman who longs to be a sex object, the difference is that is not all she longs to be.”

Eleanor Roosevelt: "The giving of love is an education in itself."

Rita Rudner: “The closest I ever came to a menage-a-trois was when I dated a schizophrenic.”

Rita Rudner: “Men reach their sexual peak at eighteen. Women reach theirs at thirty-five. Do you get the feeling that God is playing a practical joke?”

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