It Happened This Week-ish: A Chelsea Handler sex tape, the end of The Office?, LiLo's porn career, Bieber Fever, Sandra Bullock's baby and more...

• Stop the effing presses! EXCLUSIVE: Insider: I Saw Kristin Cavallari "Do a Line of Cocaine." Whaaaaaaaattttttttt? You mean to tell me that a too-rich, uber-thin, not so smart, mildly insane girl who grew up on reality television and has willingly subjected herself to having her life filmed so that others can publicly mock her, might have access to designer drugs AND use them?!?! "Insider," whoever you may be, you are dirty liar.

• Sandra Bullock traded up, replacing her cheating hobag of a husband for an adorable little baby boy who likes to wear beaded necklaces... I hope it's not a Nazi-beaded necklace. Ba-zing! Too soon?

• Bieber Fever is taking the nation by storm and even Kim Kardashian is falling victim to his shiny locks, hairless face and Gap Kids wardrobe.

• As much as I despise The Hills, I have equal passionate yet totally opposite feelings about kids doing funny things (aka, I luuuuuv it). Needless to say, "Kids Reenact: The Hills" has become my favorite thing on the internet since I discovered ZooBorns. Next I want to see "Kids Reenact: Project Runway"... toddler Tim Gunn in a teensytiny tailored suit telling the other toddlers to "make it wurk." For realzies, my ovaries just exploded.

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