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It Happened This Week-ish: John Mayer attacks the media, 50 cent tweets about his grandma, Paris gets busted in Vegas, Gary Busey saves the day and more...

By Amanda Allwood on Tue, Aug 31, 2010 at 8:03 pm

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Paris Hilton is having the worst week ever (Best Week Ever is off the air so I can totally steal their tagline, right?). First, a man who maybe had knives, according to Paris but not according to those silly police, tried to break in to her home. Then, she gets arrested on the Vegas strip for cocaine possession. But with all that knife-stress, who can blame her. Plus, it is like really hard to be that pretty.

Montel Williams wants to become the celebrity face of the Bay Area medical marijuana business. His target audience will be former guests on his show.

Gary Busey is a hero, a highway hero according to TMZ. He rescued a young man after a car accident this week-ish. The victim is doing fine, just a little sore and obviously suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder after learning that Gary Busey is in fact, a real person.

Anyone who watched the Emmy's and is under the age of 30, may have been a bit confused about on what is up with this new Shia Labuffguyfromtransformers movie. You see, it's a sequel to a movie called Wall Street that came out in 1987. Forget about "striking when the iron is hot!" "Striking when the iron has broken and been sent to the thrift store" is the next big trend.

In the following preview for the new series "Teach: Tony Danza," the kids say that Mr. D never gave up but the thing is, he did kind of give up. I mean, he was an actor with a sitcom on network television and now he is a teacher with a reality show on A&E. It feels like a downgrade.

*allegedly

(Shameless campaign for popularity starts here) Follow me on Twitter, @MandaAnn and keep up with all your pop-culturely needs at @AltDotPop. Vote for me as the Best CL Contributor in Best of the Bay. If I win, I will give you all a virtual high-five and I may wear a gown/fancy party dress to the awards show. (End self-promotion)

Contrary to the responsible reporting of various tabloids and the Huffington Post, John Mayer and Jennifer Aniston are NOT dating again. In fact, John Mayer has finally done exactly what we all kind of want to do, except no one reads our blogs, he called them out on being gossipy pieces of crap. He may be a womanizing man-whore* with the voice of an angel, but he makes a point and a killer visual, "a stripper wearing reading glasses."

Speaking of strippers (not technically, but kindasorta), Heidi Montag and playmate, Karissa Shannon made a sexxx tape and then Spencer found it and now he has Karissa's camera with that video and there are also other things on it that she doesn't "want to come out." OMG, I am so bored with Heidi and her stupid face. Someone just push her off a ledge, she is top heavy, it won't be too difficult.

It's tough to be a Fiddy Cent when yo grandmother needs her trash taken out. Cuz it's all like "I'm rich, I can't be doin' this shiz" and then the Twitter people get all up on you fo complainin'. (This is a reenactment of an actual event, tweets prove it.)

No one told E! that Leonardo DiCaprio has been in a film since Titanic.

After the jump car crashes, drugs, wall street and Tony Danza...

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