*Hey boys, now you too can claim you had an affair with Tiger Woods! I am just waiting for Lance Bass to get on this train of mistresses…or misters? I think it's misters.
*My favorite washed-up pop princess, though she is probably at queen age now, Mariah Carey, gave us the best acceptance speech we could possibly ask for this week. And by best, I mean drunkest. Thank you Mariah, seriously thank you.
*Marilyn Manson and Evan Rachel Wood are among the holiday engagements during this fabulous season where all single girls flip through People Magazine, mumbling about how if that chick can find a man and I can't, I am going to go effing kill myself. Not that I would know, I don't do that….nope, never. Also, their kids are gonna be real pale and stuff. Ba-zing, take that happy couple!
*Casey Johnson, heiress to the Johnson & Johnson fortune, died this week at the young age of 30. It appears that 2009 was just ramping us up for young and untimely deaths, as we started this year off with yet another young "celebrity" leaving the world too soon. Luckily, E! took it upon themselves to ask the question on everyone's minds…Casey Johnson: What Will Happen to Her Dogs?
*Get ready for the most shocking headline of the week. No, seriously, like this is insane. I read it and I was like…"Wait. (pause for effect) Seriously?! Wow. Just, wow." Check it out after the jump, if you dare…
This article appears in Jan 6-12, 2010.