'ManWords': redefining primal grunts and penis jokes

Captain America: n. like the comic book Captain America who always has his shield at the ready, this dude always has a condom set to go.


Chocolate Bunny: n. someone who is exciting, beautiful, and delicious on the outside but empty inside.


Condiments: n. originally a term used to describe ketchup, mustard, and other things you'd put on a sandwich, but now used to refer to condoms.


Cupcake: v. to stay in and cuddle instead of going out.


Hasbian: n. a woman who used to be a lesbian, most likely in college.


Madam's Apple: n. an Adam's apple that, for some reason, appears on a woman.


MBA: n. married but available.


Penis Elbow: n. like tennis elbow, it is inflammation caused by excessive masturbation; treatments include creating an online dating profile, or in extreme circumstances canceling Internet subscriptions.


Raincoat: n. a condom; men should always wear a raincoat, even if the woman says she has a built-in awning.


Rubenesque: n. fat but cute—like an overfed cat.


Tadpole: n. a guy who dates cougars.


Check out the book and the author at JeremyGreenberg.com


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The dictionary is filled with terms, both great and small, for helping a man relate the magnificence of his penis to other men, as well as gentlemanly words for negotiating with women a place to store said penis. Jeremy Greenberg's book, ManWords: Real Words for Real Men, distills some of this sexually charged vernacular down to a manageable size that can be processed while a man is seated atop his ivory throne of solitude. The lexicon Greenberg unloads may not necessarily impress women, but it does provide men a flourish of language with which to describe all the sex they are not having. Below is a sample.

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