Dear Oracle Of Ybor, I can’t believe I’m about to be that person asking about a love connection, but it’s all I’ve been thinking of for weeks. I met a Virgo online. We hung out a few times and had a beautiful connection instantly that only gets stronger every time we are together. We are both spiritual, intuitive, and creative individuals. Sometimes he goes MIA for days, cutting all communication. We haven’t established any expectations on our connections because we both dislike labels and putting things in a box. We are just going with the flow, in other words. However, I have strong feelings for Virgo, and I can’t stop thinking about him and the good times we’ve had together. My question is: Where does my connection with Virgo stand right now? Please help me!!!! Thank you so much for your amazing section on CL. —Scorpio
Cards: Nine of Cups, Six of Pentacles, Strength, Ten of Wands, Four of Wands
Dear Scorpio, Thank you for asking a love connection question during Cancer season! While this won’t get published until we’re all brazenly embracing the Leo season, it’s a joy to hear from water signs during this time of heightened emotions. (As a Scorpio moon, I feel you.) However, I do think you might need to lean into that fiery Leo energy to get things going.
For you, I drew the Nine of Cups, fitting for a water sign. Nine of Cups is a terribly romantic card, with the heart overflowing, but it can be a card where you prefer a fantasy image over reality… and this can mean ignoring how you really feel. You mention that you haven’t established any expectations, and you both “dislike labels and putting things in a box.” The question I want you to reflect on is this: Do you honestly dislike those things? Do you think expectations would ruin the fun, or might they make you feel more grounded?
For Virgo, I drew earth-heavy Six of Pentacles, suggesting that they’re a giving partner and happy to put their energy into something to help it grow, which is excellent! For where things stand right now, I drew Strength, a Major Arcana that’s all about trust and balance. I absolutely believe that you two had an instant connection and have spirituality and creativity in common. It’s a new relationship, but it’s a strong one, which is good news!
However, it won’t be untested for long. For “things you don’t know,” I got the Ten of Wands, aka the burden. This is often a card of burnout, but in relationships, it can also mean resentment. This can be one person feeling like they’re doing everything—putting in all the effort, doing all the cleaning, taking care of the kids, etc. It can also mean holding back all their feelings. Ten of Wands is a heavy burden, and a person can crack under it. But it’s not so bad if two people split the load. So don’t keep things that upset you to yourself.
Communication is absolutely key, and again, I want you to really think about what you want in the relationship. Does it bother you that Virgo goes incommunicado for days at a time? Do you know why they do that? (Are they an introvert who needs space? Do they go through a technology breakup phase every few weeks? Are they bad at turning off “Do Not Disturb” like I am?)
If it bothers you, speak up. It doesn’t have to come across as needy. It’s pretty hot to have someone say “I want you,” which is what you’re saying when you say you like hearing from them. But be honest about what you want and how much “going with the flow” you’re actually ok with. If it’s super new, it’s OK to see how things develop, but just because you both declare you don’t like labels at the beginning doesn’t mean you can’t readdress it later because it can be hard to keep strong feelings at bay.
I once dated someone who didn’t like labels or thinking about the future, and I was too young to press things. One day, six months into dating him, I realized I was in love with him. And I immediately broke down sobbing because what good could come of that? I didn’t tell him for four months, convinced he’d bolt if I told him. And he didn’t—he said he loved me, too. But it was torturous, and unfortunately, it was a pattern I kept repeating in my 20s.
So if you listen to nothing else, hear this: do not spend your vibrant life being scared to tell people you’re really into them because that doesn’t protect you from getting hurt. It doesn’t help you when you see them making out with someone else at the bar, and you feel like you cannot breathe. It doesn’t shield you from disappointment or crying in the Uber home. Yes, they might not be into you, and it hurts to hear that. But it might lead to something exciting. So be honest with yourself and with the people you date.
I think if you and Virgo talk openly and often, there’s good news on the horizon. For the final outcome, I pulled the Four of Wands. It’s a card of stability, of love blooming, of support and community. So be honest! Communicate your feelings and listen to each other! Great things can happen.
So this Leo season, be bold, baby. Tell Virgo what you want, what you really really want. Sting their heart. Send thirst trap pics if that’s your thing. Embrace the heat and fuck it, fall in love if you’re feelin’ it. We all almost died. Now’s the time to viciously live!*
(*But safe sex and vaccines come first! Does anyone want to be dealing with a Covid cough and chlamydia at the same time? I don’t think so.)
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