MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE III (PG-13) There wasn't a whole lot of logic or intricacy of plot in this franchise's first two installments either, but at least they were fun. Like its predecessors, M:I3 is all about the thrill of the chase, but the director this time out is J.J. Abrams, a TV veteran who shoots the film's all-important action sequences as frenzied, faceless and not particularly appetizing blurs that make us long for the unique stylistic signature of De Palma or John Woo. Tom Cruise returns, fresh from his baby-making marketing tie-in with Katie Holmes, but the real (and nearly only) reason to see the film is Oscar-winner Phillip Seymour Hoffman (Capote), who chews the scenery in style as a villainous arms dealer. Also stars Ving Rhames, Billy Crudup, Michelle Monaghan, Jonathan Rhys Meyers and Laurence Fishburne. 3 stars
THE NOTORIOUS BETTIE PAGE (R) The "notorious" in the title is both significant and ironic, since this cleverly crafted and very entertaining biopic portrays its subject — 1950s pin-up queen Bettie Page — as a sweet, innocent lamb who literally has to have it explained to her why some self-appointed protectors of society find her nude posing disgusting. There's a sprinkling of solid social commentary here, but don't go expecting another wrenching attack on social mores and repressed sexuality along the lines of The People vs Larry Flynt. Director Mary Harron (I Shot Andy Warhol) and writer Guinevere Turner (Go Fish) mainly have a lot of fun detailing Page's life from her prim upbringing in Nashville to her rise to fame as a nudie icon in New York. Gretchen Mol is surprisingly effective in the lead role, the film's blending of black-and-white and saturated color photography beautifully captures the spirit its 50's setting, just as its playfully mocking tone nails Page's basic approach to sex and life. Also stars Lili Taylor. 3.5 stars
POSEIDON (PG-13) Poseidon is a thrill machine in the worst sense of the phrase — its characters are merely fodder for the machine, and it churns out its would-be thrills with such grinding, formulaic precision that the film becomes anything but exciting. After a perfunctory introduction of its characters (rugged, attractive or plucky stock types, all), the movie's titular ship is knocked for a loop by a tsunami-sized rogue wave. There's not even much dialogue — a good thing really, considering the lameness of what comes out of people's mouths here — so what we get is basically 90 minutes of forgettable characters wandering from one chamber to the next, leaping across chasms, climbing up shafts and dealing with copious amounts of fire and water as they attempt to stay alive. Stars Josh Lucas, Kurt Russell, Richard Dreyfuss, Jacinda Barrett and Emmy Rossum. 2 stars
SCARY MOVIE 4 (PG-13) Another round of random spoofing, David Zucker style, of the latest batch of horror flicks — Saw, The Grudge, The Village, and so on — with much hilarity involving bodily functions and obligatory doses of T & A no doubt abounding. Stars Anna Faris, Regina Hall, Criag Bierko, Carmen Electra and Andre Benjamin. (Not Reviewed)
THE SENTINEL (PG-13) Kiefer Sutherland seems to be doing a variation of his 24 schtick here, racing around with fellow secret service agent Michael Douglas while the life of the President of the United States is in danger. The bankable cast also features Eva Longoria and, in a major assault to credulity, Kim Basinger as the First Lady. (Not Reviewed)
SILENT HILL (R) Yes, it's yet another scary movie based on a video game. But before you start rolling your eyes as visions of Resident Evil flood your weary brain, consider that the director here is Christophe Gans, whose Brotherhood of the Wolf infused a breath of originality and elegance into the horror genre a few years back. As for a plot, Silent Hill takes place in a town where the inhabitants are battling all sorts of freaky, evil thingies — a set-up that sounds a whole lot like, you guessed it, Resident Evil. Stars Radha Mitchell, Sean Bean, Laurie Holden and Deborah Unger. (Not Reviewed)
TAKE THE LEAD (PG-13) It's To Sir With Love meets Mad Hot Ballroom, hip-hop style, when a professional ballroom dancer (Antonio Banderas) lands a gig in a New York City high school and finds his old-school methods challenged by modern attitudes. Despite sounding like a fusion of way too many movies floating around in the pop culture ether, Take the Lead insists that it's actually based on a true story. Also stars Alfre Woodard, Ray Liotta, Rob Brown and Dante Basco. (Not Reviewed)
