SHANGHAI KNIGHTS (PG-13) If you're gonna insist on making a distressingly formulaic sequel to a distressingly formulaic comedy, then this might be the way to go, by overstuffing it with so much nonsensical material that some of it is bound to charm through sheer willpower. Its 2000 predecessor, Shanghai Noon, ranked as one of the weaker "odd couple" comedies of late, with Jackie Chan and Owen Wilson going through the paces in a dull action romp set in the Old West. Knights is clearly an improvement, with Chan and Wilson (both more animated than in the previous picture) heading to London to solve the murder of Chan's character's father. The anachronisms make Oliver Stone's dramas seem like cinema verite documentaries by comparison, yet it's perversely pleasurable to hear The Who's "My Generation" and "Magic Bus" in a film that's set in 1887. 
1/2
SPIDER (R) David Cronenberg's elegant but icy new film is not only a movie about the human mind; it's a movie that takes place almost entirely within that mysterious gray zone, in the brain of a tormented schizophrenic nicknamed Spider (Ralph Fiennes). It's nearly impossible to know what's real and what is invention in the film's dense, eerie blurring of past and present, fact and fiction, as the adult Spider becomes a silent observer of his own childhood. In less time than you can say "Psych 101," little Dennis is exhibiting classic Oedipal warning signs, compartmentalizing all women as either saints or whores, and mentally transforming his demure homemaker mother into a series of vulgar floozies. Spider is like one of the makeshift webs that Fiennes' character is constantly fashioning of old bits of twine and stringing above his bed: a strange, sticky maze reflecting the labyrinthine mental processes of its maker. Also stars Gabriel Byrne and Lynne Redgrave. 1/2
TOP SPEED (NR) Another IMAX movie experience that is both entertaining and painlessly educational. Top Speed replicates the adrenaline rush of speed-freaks and charts the endless human obsession of going really fast. (Not Reviewed)
VIEW FROM THE TOP (PG-13) Part Miss Congeniality, part Bring It On, View From the Top is Bruno Barreto's tale of a small-town girl who works her way up the flight attendant ladder. Mike Myers does his cross-eyed best to haul this average movie out of the quagmire but doesn't, and the upward mobility of Donna (Gwyneth Paltrow) is rarely matched by the movie itself. More a collection of passe stewardess jokes than an entirely self-supporting movie, View From the Top is big-hearted enough to transcend its slapdash approach to structure and script. Unfortunately, the bad casting, silly jokes and laughably improbable ending prove more difficult to transcend, leaving us with a frustrating misfire. —Dave Stevenson
WHAT A GIRL WANTS (PG) Stuffy English stereotypes galore in this excruciating Romantic Comedy Writing 101 exercise from Dennie Gordon, who inflicts intelligence-insulting and blindingly obvious father-daughter humor by way of Daphne (Amanda Bynes), the illegitimate child of a New York hippie and her dad (Colin Firth), a distinguished MP. The British stereotypes fly thick and fast, from the crusty old grandmother to the rather charming British stuttering so perfected by Hugh Grant, but offered here by Firth. I laughed. I cried. I tried to fashion a crude noose from the threads of the theater seat. Firth does his level best with what little script and cooperation from the surrounding cast he gets and lends credibility and comic timing to an exercise that would barely even raise an eyebrow without him. The script is workable, and if some of the more heavy-handed Brit-stereotypes were ripped from the screenplay (and preferably stuffed down the throats of the writers), this would be the bubblegum-chewing crowd pleaser that it has the potential to be. —Dave Stevenson
—Reviewed entries by Lance Goldenberg unless otherwise noted
