The Grind podcast 9/29: Rays are in, we stick up for the fans and the F in NFL stands for Felon

It's been a fortnight since our last podcast. That's two weeks for you Florida State grads (BAM). Rays won then lost, then won again. The Bucs won then lost and lost spectacularly. Michael Vick had an orange jumpsuit two years ago and now makes more per week than you will in your whole life. Yep, lots to rap about. So let's peruse the cheat sheet for a half-assed transcript of today's cyber-ramblings. On we go.

The Bucs suck. Want something a little more cerebral? How's this? The Bucs indubitably suck an ardent amount of burro gonads. We discuss the political correctness of describing a crappy 2-0 team (example: A win is a win) before the inevitable reality check of the Steeler molestation.

Speaking of Steeler molestation, only one more week of banging erasers in detention for Big Ben before he can once again take the field and wag his metaphorical genitalia to law-abiding fans everywhere who send their kids to community college so they can afford tickets to watch him throw a football. Meanwhile, international crime-boss Michael Vick is winning over the (soulless) hearts and (vacant) minds of the Phili faithful. Back here at home, Bucs fans want to see more of that running back that punched out everybody but the cotton-candy guy because he ran a few garbage yards against the Steeler scrubs. What's wrong with this picture besides everything? We get all up in commissioner Roger Goodell's grill about his complicity of the NFL's transformation to the NBA.

Speaking of complicity, we take issue with Raheem Morris' stance on Tanard Jackson's suspension for whatever the hell he smoked, snorted, or injected. Not to mention the "legalize it" crowd with their whole tired and overused retread what's-the-big-deal-it's-just-a-little-weed argument. First off, we don't know if hippy-lettuce was what the dip shit tested positive for the go-zillionth time around in the first place. Secondly, if it's not a big deal, then it shouldn't be a big deal to quit to save your career and make millions of bucks, should it Sherlock?

Speaking of Sherlock, you don't have to be Holmes to tackle the whole Rays attendance issue once and for all. We're not afraid to say it. The location totally sucks ass. Want something more cerebral? The locale unambiguously nurses my hindquarters. Period. There are other peripheral reasons, but our biggest beef is with the question itself.

Why aren't people going to the Rays games?

The premise is false. It's an all-or-nothing, close-minded, close-ended question designed to end the discussion before it begins. As soon as somebody mentions that the drive is too long, the avalanche of transplant anecdotal horseshit obliterates the poor bastard.

"Back in New York it took us 72 hours, two trains, four buses and a cab to make a Yankee game."

So f***ing what? There's people starving in Africa but if my Outback steak is cold, I'm sending it back.

My point is, the location is not the reason why people aren't going to Rays games. The location is why people aren't going to more Rays games. If it were closer, people would go more. Ta-da!

Put it this way. You have two friends. One lives next door, one lives 20 miles away. Which bud would you tend to hang with more? Oh, and your friend is on TV. Did I lose you?

Speaking of more, there's much much more unintelligible sports gab on The Grind podcrapcast.


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