Domino's Pizza has made noise of late with their heavily advertised "Big Taste Bailout." Ostensibly a handout to down-on-their-luck pizza lovers across the nation, the "Big Taste Bailout" offers one-topping pizzas or hot sandwiches for $5 each, provided you buy a minimum of three. In addition to being a supposedly great deal, Domino's is clearly advancing a "we feel feel your pain" meme, hoping to engender loyalty in the general public. Per the press release:
"We know times are hard, it's a reality we are all facing," says [Domino's CEO Dave] Brandon. "But I didn't go to Washington to ask for a bailout. Instead, we are giving one. I'm proud to be able to offer our consumers a promotion with such a great deal on pizza. By adding our oven baked sandwiches to the mix we are further increasing the number of taste varieties to the offering."
Domino's is also looking for some help from you:
In an on-line continuation of the promotion, Domino's is launching the Super Big Taste Bailout. Here, consumers are encouraged to nominate a friend in need of a bailout. Two winners, as well as their nominating friends, will receive a year's worth of Domino's Pizza products with the prize delivered directly to their door by Dave Brandon himself.
Seems like a terrific deal, right? It isn't. My message to Domino's Pizza and their smarmy, incredibly cynical marketing promotion: Go fuck yourself.
This article appears in Mar 25-31, 2009.