![Healing "laying on of hands" ceremony in the Pentecostal Church of God. Lejunior, Harlan County, Kentucky, 15 September 1946. - Russell Lee [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons](https://media1.cltampa.com/cltampa/imager/u/original/12028418/faith_healing.5a95038919a10.png)
The sicker you are in life, the more people offer to cure you. As someone with a visible disability, I would know. Around 2011, my immune system got so out of whack it started destroying the blood vessels in my lungs. The result: I went from being a full-time research scientist at a top research university to being an unemployed 30-something on oxygen.
Walking through life as a 30-something on oxygen is an interesting experience. All of a sudden, total strangers approach you in public and offer to cure your disease. Most of them don’t even know what that disease is, but that doesn’t stop them from offering you a handful of pink salt and a mountain of false hopes.
I remember the day I was approached by a woman wanting to sell me Himalayan sea salt. She was positive that her Himalayan sea salt could cure me. I had just ordered my espresso when she walked over and started chatting me up on the “miracle” that is sea salt. Fucking sea salt. It’s delicious, but it won’t cure you of anything. I politely said no three times before grabbing my coffee and running for the door.
The practice of amateur healing isn’t restricted to just salespeople, either. Let’s not forget about religion. One day, I was sitting outside a shopping mall enjoying a delicious sandwich when two young men walked over and asked if they could pray for me. I’m thinking, sure, why not, if it makes them feel better. Apparently, it was supposed to make me feel better, too, because after they finished their solemn prayer ritual, hand on my shoulder, they told me I could take my oxygen off. I don’t want to say that these guys were trying to kill me, but they totally could have killed me — if I were a total moron, that is.
Think this sounds bad? Dr. Edward Leonard has seen worse. As CEO of Tampa-based Florida Wellness Medical Group, it’s his job to evaluate different conventional and alternative medicine approaches and decide which to incorporate into his practice. In the process, he’s seen some good medicine and some weird shit. My favorite of his stories involves a form of energy healing observed in the Netherlands. The “technique” is practiced by a man claiming to have an extra chromosome, says Leonard.
“Because he has Down syndrome?” I ask.
“Because he has alien DNA,” says Leonard. “It’s a special chromosome, so that he can communicate with his home planet.”
“That must be chromosome 82,” I jest.
“It must have been,” says Dr. Leonard, playing along. “He would reach up to the sky to grab energy and manipulate the person on the table so he could heal them.”
What a load of bullshit. Humans have 46 chromosomes. If you are born with an extra chromosome, the result is Down syndrome, not special healing powers.
Alternative medicine. It’s a jungle out there. Stick with us in the coming days, as we riddle it out with local doctors.
Jen Ring discovered her love of writing through the lens of a brand new camera. When she’s not taking photographs, she’s writing about taking photographs and other fun things to do in the Tampa Bay area. Check out her Photographer’s Notebook for photography tips, tricks, and pics, and subscribe to her newsletter to follow her other adventures.
