After surviving months of chemotherapy and radiation treatment for cervical cancer, Brashier discovered that the damage done to her vaginal tissue made sex painful. In addition to a sudden loss of her love life, Brashier found it difficult to meet romantic partners who could handle or understand her limitations.
"This has proven to be an enormous challenge when it comes to dating," Brashier writes. "When the topic of intimacy is raised, I fear that once my partner knows my limitations, he may lose interest."
As a result, she started 2date4love.com for other singles who are still looking for love despite injuries, disabilities, diseases, or any other reason that has diminished the role sex plays in their lives.
"2date4love is a dating site that enables people who cannot engage in sexual intercourse to meet and experience love, companionship and intimacy at its deepest level," the website reads.
Since its launch at the beginning of August, the website has gained more than 1,500 members. Like any other dating site you can upload photos, fill out a profile with your interests, and describe the type of relationship you are looking for—which presumably is not a sexual one.
For all the website's claims of intimacy without sex, I still wonder how much sex, or at least sex appeal and sex drive, play in finding a love connection. Just because Brashier can no longer have vaginal intercourse does not mean that she would not be open to other forms of physical intimacy. Similarly, even though prostate cancer leaves many sufferers impotent, this does not stop them from enjoying alternative forms of sex. With that in mind, I wonder if the site is really for individuals who are seeking partners who understand and accept their sexual limitations.
Also, it will be interesting to see how the demography of the site compares to other dating sites, which are notoriously overloaded with horny men. On a dating site where sex is off the table, will men become the sex that is in-demand? Will their inboxes become overloaded with messages from eager women looking to hook-up for sex-less dates? Will men seek partners actually based on their shared interests, or, like any other dating site, will men still message people they consider the most sexually appealing?
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