Outside the White House shortly after noon, Ol' Joe Biden told the nation he isn't going to be running for president in 2016.
This obviously shuts down the speculation that he would opt to run despite an already competitive candidate field and the fact that he is still grieving the death of his son Beau in May.
"The window has closed," he said.
That's obviously good news for Hillary Clinton, who faces a challenge from the left from Sen. Bernie Sanders and for whom having a charming son-of-a-gun like Biden espousing virtually the same platform as Clinton would not be ideal.
The decision probably derives from political calculus. Recent polling shows he'd tank at the moment and Clinton more or less edged him out of a nice centrist sweet spot during last week's CNN Democratic debate.
There is always the possibility that all hell breaks loose and Clinton steps down, due to health issues or a scandal that isn't political bullshit, writes Kyle Kondik, managing editor of Sabato's Crystal Ball.
But for now, it looks like Ol' Joe is going to focus on the fight for equality, environmental protection, scientific advancement and an end to pointless and horrific warfare.
Perhaps loftiest of all, he called for a bipartisan approach to solving these issues (which Republicans tend to not think are issues, but okay).
"I don't believe, like some do, that it's naive to talk to Republicans," said Biden. "I don't think we should look at Republicans as our enemies. They are our opposition, they're not our enemies."
Seriously, he said, this shit needs to stop.
"Four more years of this kind of pitched battle may be more than this country can take. We have to change it."
Despite all the partisanship and gridlock, etc. he said he thinks positive change is imminent.
"I am more optimistic about the possibilities, the incredible possibilities to leap forward than I have been any time in my career. And I believe to my core that there's no country on the face of the earth better positioned to lead the world in the 21st century than the United States of America. Washington, though, just has to begin to function again."
Some Republicans seized on Biden's announcement to attack Clinton, as the Republican National Committee did here. Perhaps the derpiest reaction came from the Drudge Report, which decided it was an appropriate occasion to call Clinton a witch for no particular reason.
Not well-played, Drudge Report. Please return to your cave now.
