Feminist — referred to socially as the F-word since the genesis of the women’s movement in the late 1960s — is a term that causes many to squirm, and many to avoid using it altogether.
Is it ignorance? Or misunderstanding of the definition?
Merriam-Webster defines feminism as:
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The theory of the political, economic, and social equality of the sexes
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Organized activity on behalf of women’s rights and interests
Simple, right?
Meet Erin Aebel, an energetic wife, mom, philanthropist, art-loving health law attorney and partner at Tampa’s Shumaker, Loop and Kendrick. Aebel is the creator of the Facebook group Surly Feminists for the Revolution, her response to the 2016 election and ensuing events.
“It just came to me as I was so distraught about the election of Donald Trump,” Aebel said. “I was literally crying on the bathroom floor as it felt like a slap in the face to women everywhere.”
The 45-year-old progressive said the election hurt her to the core, but she was able to take solace in the fact that there are so many like-minded women out there.
“Thankfully, I have a lot of good women friends and we just started reaching out to each other,” Aebel said. “I thought I’d take all this strong energy and do something good with it.”
Such is the nature of the bubbly, red-lipstick-and-four-inch-heels-wearing self-described “girly-girl.”
In the 11 months since the Surly Feminists for the Revolution Facebook page launched, 13,133 men, women and girls have signed on from 50-plus countries and counting. Namibia, Poland, India, Philippines, Pakistan and Russia are among them.
Members are Democrats, Republicans, Christians, Mormons and those with no party or religious affiliation. The youngest members hover around 17; the oldest are in their 70s. They are voices yearning to be heard, to be a part of something bigger while sharing information and being reminded that as humans, particularly women, they are not alone. Collectively, all are reminded, they can make a difference.
Along with co-administrator Liz Chatelain Lanier, whom Aebel refers to as the “Cajun troll slayer,” Aebel views the group’s contributors as essential to a good information diet. Crossing 27 time zones globally, information and links to articles on the page appear around the clock. Despite her claim that she usually gets up around 6 a.m., Aebel’s posts can show up as early as 4:30 a.m.
The New York Times, Wall Street Journal and Guardian fuel Aebel’s initial morning news injection.
“Your information diet is so important,” Aebel said. “I think about that more than ever.”
She estimates that she spends 10 hours each day working for her law firm, but she makes room for as much information as possible.
With Lanier and Aebel’s eagle-eye monitoring, content on the page, including comments, is meticulously reviewed. Thoughtful dialogue is encouraged; hateful attackers are expelled. Group members have been disinvited. Most ask for forgiveness and after a “time-out” are allowed back in.
“I’m a very forgiving person,” Aebel said. “Sometimes conversations can get heated and hey, maybe someone is just having a bad day.”
About a quarter of the posts appear to be direct responses to Trump’s latest perceived missteps. The rest are mostly comprised of links and comments related to topics like climate change, healthcare reform and global issues, though recent revelations regarding alleged sexual abuse from Hollywood movie mogul Harvey Weinstein have initiated intensive dialogue among members — all offering support for each other.
“Yeah, we bitch about Trump a lot,” Aebel said. “But we do so much more than that.”
The group’s mission statement says it all:
“The Surly Feminists are a force for positivity, inclusiveness and progress. We are doing socially significant acts to combat misogyny and prejudice. We are a sanctuary from negativity. We meet online and in person. All genders and gender identifications are welcome, so long as you are somewhat surly and feminist. Purpose is to discuss opportunities for positive philanthropy, peaceful demonstrations, and support for like-minded political candidates.”
Book groups, yoga classes, fundraisers and local campaign events stream constantly onto the page’s event calendar. Members are encouraged to share their own. Aebel’s group works collaboratively with local activist groups like Indivisible Action Together Tampa Bay.
Obsessed with local, state and national politics, Aebel frequently hosts fundraisers for candidates she believes have good intent and can truly make a difference.
Her support of St. Petersburg Mayor Rick Kriseman (who is currently entrenched in a reelection battle against former Mayor Rick Baker, a conservative Republican), as well as several other candidates, is well-known. Aebel has hosted several Kriseman fundraisers on both sides of the Bay as well as fundraisers for several local and statewide candidates.
How is this all possible for this mom, full-time attorney and member of several boards including Ruth’s List and the St. Petersburg Museum of Fine Arts?
Aebel credits the support of her feminist husband of 20 years, attorney Bruce Aebel, whom she describes as a truck-driving, hunter-fisherman lawyer.
“He does most of the cooking, helps with childcare and despite his no-party affiliation, wears his long-sleeve Surly Feminist shirt all the time,” Aebel said. “He’s not interested in politics but we talk about feminism all the time.”
As do Aebel’s children — Lillian Rose, 13, and Beau, 10. Roundtable discussions are held often among family members; Aebel recently gave Lillian Rose a copy of Malala Yousfzai’s book I am Malala as a gift. Aebel says that while Lillian Rose is artistic and politically and socially aware, Beau is passionate about politics and a source of good kitchen-table banter.
Aebel adds that her law firm supports her unconditionally.
On October 23, she hosted a fundraiser at Shumaker’s Tampa office for St. Petersburg City Council Chair Darden Rice, a stalwart progressive seeking reelection.
Among other women Aebel admires are U.S. Rep. Kathy Castor (D-Tampa), U.S. Sen. Elizabeth Warren (D-Mass), LGBT activist and Equality Florida executive director Nadine Smith as well as, of course, Yousfzai — not to mention countless other women locally, nationally and globally.
Some political insiders have sought to encourage Aebel to run for office. She says that perhaps in five or ten years that may be a consideration.
“I’m studying politics and policy closely but I think I can make a huge difference without ever holding office,” Aebel said.
She acknowledges improvements are essential for both the Democratic and Republican parties.
“The Republican Party needs to be a truly conservative party,” Aebel said. “And the Democrats need to be more disciplined.”
In the meantime, Aebel will continue on her trajectory of information dissemination, supporting candidates, remaining true to her 10-plus hours a day wearing her lawyer hat.
“When we allow women to lead, I think great things happen.”
