Daddy's Little Girl: A daughter tries to educate her father about homosexuality

Share on Nextdoor

After that our relationship has ranged somewhere between casual indifference and outright disapproval. Any chance that he gets, he spouts out some Bible verse or misinformed information on gay people, the gay lifestyle and how we're all going to hell.

My father and I often have heated discussions on whether being a pedophile makes you gay (no); whether you have to be exposed to homosexuals and wrongly influenced to be gay (also no); and whether black gay men are the reason that AIDS is so bad in the African American community (sadly, yes). I'm sure these arguments don't help him accept me any faster, but part of me believes that education is the cure for ignorance. So I spend a lot of time educating him on the lives of gay people.

I guess I should be happy because I'm still allowed in the family house. I'd rather not be welcomed at all than to come over and be ignored. It would also help if he didn't discourage my mom from attending important events in my life like my wedding.[image-1]My parents have never even been to my apartment, despite the fact that I've lived there close to a year.

It's very hard to be a homosexual. We have to fight to be recognized as equal citizens. It's extremely hard not to be accepted, but especially hard to be discriminated against in your own family. I live for the day when I can reenact the scene from The Color Purple where Shug Avery's father finally accepts her and hugs her. So I can whisper into my father's ear and say  as she did, "">See Daddy, sinners have Soul, too." Until that day I live my life patiently waiting to become Daddy's Little Girl again.

And I know I'm one of the fortunate ones: I'm a pretty well-adjusted individual.  But gay youth who are not accepted by their families often end up addicted to drugs or alcohol, subject to depression and even suicide. I ask that people think about those possibilties when they react to the fact that their child is a homosexual.

My father loves me, I know this. He doesn't accept me because I'm gay.

I should be over this, being that I'm 26 years old and married with a child of my own. But I'm not.

I don't feel loved when every accomplishment that I achieve is overshadowed by my "mortal sin" of gayness. My father is very passionate about religion and believes that homosexuality is a sin. I'm also very passionate about my religion; however, I don't believe in discussing religion with other people. I also don't believe that God made homosexuality  a sin. And even if it is, that's something for me and him to discuss when that time comes.

I had a pretty good upbringing and was very close to my father. I grew up knowing that he loved me. Although I'm the oldest of the birth children, I was daddy's little girl — his "Princess," his namesake — and all was well until my sister outed me at 17.

Scroll to read more News Feature articles


Join Creative Loafing Tampa Bay Newsletters

Subscribe now to get the latest news delivered right to your inbox.