Don't do this in bed: Annoying sexual habits

1. Bad kissing:  Maybe you don't realize you are a bad kisser, but if you slobber all over my face, gag me with your tongue, or use your teeth to chew my lips off, you suck at it.  Kiss softly at first, warm me up a bit, and be patient.


2.  Leaving clothes on during sex: Do you occasionally leave on your socks or your t-shirt? I'm sure you would be unhappy if I left on my bra or worse yet, a blouse. Take it off, take it all off!


3.  Squeezing my breasts too hard: Whether your girl has natural breasts or implants there's no need to squeeze them until they are bruised.   Likewise over twisting her nipples is bad form as well - they aren’t removable.  Implants are expensive so if you don't want to buy me a new set you had better treat them with care!


4.  Randomly shoving your finger/dick/foreign object in my ass. I do like a little ass play now and then, but the sudden invasion into my backdoor is a No No. Take some time to tease around the area first.  If I don't push you away you may proceed. Better yet just ask me, "Can I play with your ass?"


5.  Grinding: Some guys and gals just don't know how to fuck.  If you climb on top and only grind away it gets boring quick.  Thrust in-and-out, hard and soft, bring it up high, push it down low.  Fuck me completely - you get the idea.


6.  Constantly asking me if its good/did I cum: Lacking self confidence isn't sexy.  Never question your abilities.  If you have to ask me if it's good I am going to tell you it's not (okay so maybe I won't but just assume that if you are questioning your abilities you need to work on them).  Did I cum?  Seriously?  No, I didn't!


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You might think that swingers are probably the best lovers.  Most have a ton of sexual experience and therefore must know how to please.  The fact is that there are a lot of lousy swingers.  The problem is no one tells them that they suck in bed.  I'm guilty of this myself.  I'm not out to hurt someone's feelings.  I just want to have a good time and go home satisfied.

Since I will never tell you what NOT to do in bed to your face I have compiled a list of annoying things that you should avoid at all costs.  And even if I have never fucked you, review this list, take note, and make sure to never ever do these things!

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