Dreaming of being a closet Republican

Not so strange when you get objective. Just connect Nixon, Republican and Bull Moose (Alaskan symbol) and you got it.

Relax -- there’s a lot of red-blooded American men hot for Sarah Palin. She is hot but alas, as you suspect, too hot to handle or rather too much a Nixon knockoff. So, put all that secret craving and hopeless yearning into supporting your candidate of choice in 2012 and point your current lust at a more available and sane woman.

Dream Momma

“’m a guy who lives in Tampa. I don't remember my dreams often, but I had one a few weeks ago that was rather disturbing It was 2012 and I found myself voting for Richard Nixon, who had somehow gotten his name on the ballot again, instead of voting for Obama like I wanted to. Very strange. I hope it doesn't mean I'm a closet Republican or something.

Let's see, when I think of Richard Nixon, I suppose I think of dishonesty, an inflamed ego, and a bit of paranoia. I watched "Frost/Nixon" a few weeks ago so he may have been fresh in my mind from that The name Richard doesn't really mean anything to me.

A friend of mine said he was going to nominate me as president in 2012  I was going to run as the Bull Moose Party, but I decided against it. I wouldn't want to take away any votes from Obama.” (sic)

Dream Momma just loves this dream. It is so easy to connect the dots I’m surprised you haven’t done so. I suspect it’s because you are a closet something but not a Republican. You, my prime-of-life dreamer are a closet hot-for-Sarah-Palin.

Scroll to read more Columns articles
Join the Creative Loafing Tampa Bay Press Club

Local journalism is information. Information is power. And we believe everyone deserves access to accurate independent coverage of their community and state.
Help us keep this coverage going with a one-time donation or an ongoing membership pledge.


Join Creative Loafing Tampa Bay Newsletters

Subscribe now to get the latest news delivered right to your inbox.

We welcome readers to submit letters regarding articles and content in Creative Loafing Tampa Bay. Letters should be a minimum of 150 words, refer to content that has appeared on Creative Loafing Tampa Bay, and must include the writer's full name, address, and phone number for verification purposes. No attachments will be considered. Writers of letters selected for publication will be notified via email. Letters may be edited and shortened for space.

Email us at [email protected]