Good Lookin' Back

BUMPER NUTS

As if the doublewide truck isn't enough of a tip-off that you have a tiny dick. (2/23)

CHIPOTLE

I don't give a crap who McOwns 'em, it's McTasty. (4/6)

ROMAN POLANSKI WINS VANITY FAIR LIBEL SUIT

Celebrates by sleeping with an entire 13-and-under girls' soccer team. (7/27)

EXOTIC AND ENDANGERED ANIMALS FOR SALE ON THE INTERNET

"Good home wanted for giraffe. Needs ladder, hole in ceiling, acacia tree grove, lots of love. Likes classical." (8/24)

NOVAK SUSPENDED FOR SAYING "BULLSHIT" ON CNN

What's new about that? Novak's been saying bullshit on CNN for years. (9/10)

ORLANDO CONGRESSMAN TOM FEENEY MAKES LIST OF "13 MOST CORRUPT IN CONGRESS"

Responds, "Who do you gotta grease to get off this list?" (9/28)

NEW ORLEANS POLICE CAUGHT ON TAPE ROUGHING UP AN ELDERLY MAN

Will you still knee me, will you still beat me, when I'm 64? (10/12)

KATIE HOLMES AND TOMMY CRUISE CONCEIVE

"You had me at I'm Clear." (10/12)

BEST BAR WITH "GROTTO" IN THE TITLE

Zendah Grotto (10/26)

WHY HAS THE TIMES CONTINUED TO SUCK UP TO ST. PETE MAYOR POST-ELECTION?

"Governor Baker will get right back to you on that," answered press secretary Adam C. Smith. (11/16)

Compiled by Weekly Planet staff

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