Rick Scott's letter to the editors, alternate version

Gov. Scott wants you to e-mail newspapers with a message. Try this one.

Dear Editor,


When PRick Scott ran for Governor he promised to create jobs and turn our economy around. I voted against PRick because he’s always been a businessman who only knows how to rip off good hard-working people. (See: His company's defrauding of Medicare.) While businessmen usually disappoint us and rarely keep their promises, PRick is refreshing because he’s not even pretending to care about his constituents and is instead viciously attacking the weakest among us: children, the poor and the elderly. His policies are driving businesses from our state while simultaneously kicking people off public assistance. Some special interests are attacking the Governor for being immoral and corrupt, but newspaper editors (like yourself) seem unwilling to take on the administration. PRick Scott deserves an unwavering and enthusiastic investigation that ends in his removal from office and incarceration. How can we expect to elect leaders who will keep their word and do what’s right for our state if we don’t stand up to those who would so callously disregard the needs of the citizenry in an effort to further enrich their CEO buddies?


[Editor's Note: The following is the original letter, which would be hilarious if it weren't so scary …]


Dear Editor,


When Rick Scott ran for Governor he promised to create jobs and turn our economy around. I voted for Rick because he’s always been a businessman, not a politician. While politicians usually disappoint us and rarely keep their promises, Rick is refreshing because he’s keeping his word. His policies are helping to attract businesses to our state and get people back to work. Some of the special interests are attacking the Governor for making tough decisions, showing leadership, and doing what he told us he would do. Rick Scott deserves our unwavering and enthusiastic support. How can we expect to elect leaders who will keep their word and do what’s right for our state if we don’t stand up for those with the courage to set priorities, make difficult choices, and actually deliver on their promises made?

Youre all so stupid!!!!
  • You're all so stupid!!!!

Facing polls that cast him as the least popular public official since Mayor Larry Vaughn, Gov. Rick Scott is calling on supporters to send letters to the editors of prominent Florida newspapers and sing the praises of the worst governor in the nation (give or take a Scott Walker). Seeing as most Rick Scott supporters must be functionally illiterate (if not, why didn't they read all those stories about what a criminal their boy is and vote against him in the first place?), The Guv's website provides some boilerplate about how awesome he is, so that supporters need only sign their name and send it off to terrified newspapermen across the state.

Thankfully, Gov. Scott's webmaster has left editable the text of the letter, allowing supporters to personalize the message — which is exactly what I've done below. Check out the official Creative Loafing edit of Gov. Scott's letter, then cut-and-paste the text into the box provided here to send it on its way. It's the least we can do …

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