A few things surprise me here… and one of them is not that Beckham would cheat on his wife. I was always more of a Baby Spice fan anyway. Everyone’s body is a temple but Mrs. Beckham’s appears to be renovated monthly. Her plastic surgeon is aware that breasts are supposed to be soft, right?
Anyway, here’s what I find amazing about soccer star numero uno’s latest controversy:
[image-1]- Isn’t Beckham one of the world’s best-looking dudes? The guy’s a supermodel. Couldn’t he pretty much bed just about any female around? So why the need for ten grand? Ask Tiger Woods about what good hush money does. Wanna be bold, David? Have a woman pay YOU for sex. Now that’d be cool.
- Beckham’s alleged mistress, Irma Nici, said the sex lasted about 15 minutes, and rated it a 7.5 out of ten. You’d think for ten K, he could have gotten a little more bang for his buck... and a few more stars to boot. If he had only coughed up a few hundred, don’t tell me she wouldn’t have given him a lower rating?
- Speaking of a one with four zeros, if Beckham is going to continue on his alleged shopping spree, can the Tampa Bay Rowdies look into signing him to a contract? We could introduce him to some of our ‘friendlier’ local establishments to jumpstart the economy. Ten grand would be just about enough to buy the remaining, unsold Buccaneers tickets so we can finally watch them on TV.
- Has Nici’s pimp surpassed Steve Williams, Tiger Woods’ caddy, as the man who pockets more money for doing as little work as possible?
None of the major sporting outlets, ESPN.com, CNNSI.com, Foxsports.com, has so far reported the alleged details of the Beckham case, but fortunately sportschump.net doesn’t have to answer to a higher authority.
Let this be a lesson, people. Money can’t buy you love. It apparently can’t buy you a few extra stars in the sack either.
And once again, it appears I have chosen the wrong profession.
