Sh*t happened 10/12/15: Enough with misinterpreting the 2nd Amendment already, Bolts rule, Randy Quaid still crazy

The first cool breeze of autumn snaked between the trees and buildings, funneling through the alley to blow up my kilt, embarrassing me in front of a dog who'd squeezed his way under a privacy fence and pressuring me to explain why I was in an alley wearing a kilt in the first place. (WHAT I DO ON KILT DAY IS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS.)

Anyway, the weekend:


"There's no connection, and you'd be a fool — and a communist — for saying so, between having a gun, and shooting someone with it, and not having a gun, and not shooting anyone." —Bill Hicks

Our condolences and support go out to the victims and families of last week's shootings in Texas and Arizona, and we once again plead for sanity regarding changes to our country's gun laws.


The Tampa Bay Lightning continued to make all of our other area major league sports franchises look like shit (not that it's hard) by beating the Buffalo Sabers to go 2 for 2 as the season opens. I still prefer oversized Disney characters on ice, but that's some good sportsing.

Randy Quaid, an actor most famous for uttering the words "shitter's full!", was detained in Vermont upon re-entering the United States after it became quite clear that Canada didn't want him. Quaid and his wife have had multiple run-ins with the law in the States, and blame it on a ring of shadowy figures they claim has killed other actors, like Heath Ledger (who died of an accidental overdose of prescription medication). Because, once you've done away with Heath Ledger, one of the most promising actors of his generation, you've just gotta up your game and set your sights on the guy famous for saying "shitter's full!"


And finally, a Bartow man battled his way through various tiers to nab a berth at the Karaoke World Championship in Singapore in November. Finally, an inspiration to all of us who constantly steal money out of our mom's purse to go down to the corner dive and drink shit beer and chicken wings in the name of "research" and "checking out the competition." And yes, of course he's got a show-stopping Journey jam in his back pocket, derf. 

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