Good morning! The government is broken.
FRIDAY, JAN. 19:
A Hernando County man passed out behind the wheel in a bank drive-thru, and requested a burrito when awakened. Let's not pass up this marvelous opportunity to demand that henceforth, all drive-thru banking should come with burritos.
A Pinellas County youth football league president is accused of scamming almost $30K out of the organization. Which is not very sportsmanlike.
SATURDAY, JAN. 20:
Hey, the federal government shut down at midnight. Again. Which side are you blaming? The other side? Yeah, it's the other side's fault.
A suspicious device that caused the evacuation of multiple businesses along Tarpon Avenue in Tarpon Springs turned out to be... a sandbag. Moving forward, perhaps we should just admit that terrorists probably don't give a shit about places like Tarpon Springs.
SUNDAY, JAN. 21:
And finally, somebody detonated an explosive device at a mall in Lake Wales, and more devices were discovered at the location. Maybe terrorists give a shit about places like Tarpon Springs, after all.