Sh*t happened 2/26/16: Tampa council wants free parking for Tampa council, Pasco commissioner is visionary hero

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Welcome to Friday, your trusted source of cynical reactions to Thursday:

Tampa City Council members voted to draw up an ordinance to allow them to park free of charge in any metered or lot space in the city. This move is turning out to be about as popular as you'd expect with EVERYBODY ELSE IN TAMPA WHO ALSO HAS A CAR AND A JOB DOWNTOWN.

A boat thief in Port Richey was apprehended after running the boat he was trying to steal into some pylons and falling into the water. *Quickly checks the headlines in a Google search* Yup. all of the good puns are already taken, sorry folks — we'll have to wait until the next time somebody gets run over by the car they're trying to steal, or whatever.

Also in Pasco County, a commissioner wants to ban tow companies from hauling away cars left overnight outside establishments that serve alcohol, as a way both to cut down on drunk driving by folks who don't want to risk the tow fee and to, erm, "curb" predatory towing in general. Since I just scored that sweet pun, let's just finish by calling this an excellent idea that should be implemented globally. Buy Commissioner Mike Moore a drink and share a cab home with him.

And finally, Slide the City, a giant, 1000-foot-long "urban" water slide, is coming to Tampa to shut down traffic at Palm Avenue and North Boulevard on May 14. Man, I miss the good old days when the Bad Ideas Economy just manifested itself in free apps that took up space on your phone for two weeks.

 

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