Sh*t happened 7/16/15: Tampa hunks on reality TV, education, overreactions

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Wednesday, a haiku:

Middle of the week
Hurdle to be overcome
News is not a thing

CNBC reality show Blue Collar Millionaires was slated to feature the dudes who got rich by creating Tampa's own College Hunks Moving Junk business. Did it? I don't know; nothing against those guys, congratulations on all the cash, but I'm too bitter by default to risk the kind of tailspin that might be triggered by watching Blue Collar Millionaires on CNBC.

A four-day operation by Polk County cops targeting shoplifters netted 36 alleged offenders. The value of the items stolen and recovered in the operation totaled — and I'm shitting you not here — $691. Fun fact: Each of the corporations whose stores participated in the crackdown saves exactly that amount in taxes each time a hummingbird flaps its wings.

Hillsborough County schools still don't know how to keep students "in line." Good idea: Reducing suspensions — punishing a kid who doesn't want to be in school by sending him or her home from school is, and has always been, beyond stupid. Bad idea: Thinking of students as cattle to be kept "in line."

And finally, a South Florida man who shot his neighbor over the neighbor's dog pooping on his son's lawn has been charged with murder. It's the culmination of years of conflict between the man and his neighbors, and a perfect example of what could've been avoided if we cut down on school suspensions. (Probably. Maybe. Actually, probably not — everybody involved sounds pretty cretinous in the "classic Florida" mold.)

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