Still got all your digits? Still got your hangover? Sorry, you still got to go to work.
A reported computer glitch screwed up the annual Channelside Fourth of July fireworks show. Many folks whose sense of self is apparently tied to seeing stuff blow up for free were left without an anchor in an alien and unforgiving world; several of them bitched about it on Twitter. (I know — try not to be shocked.) Phrases like "planned our entire day around the fireworks show" do not exactly inspire within me a kindred righteous anger.
In another corner of the Bay area, many folks whose sense of self is apparently tied to creating their own kind of fireworks converged on Hernando Sportsman's Club's annual Machine Gun Shoot in Brooksville, where they fired an estimated 100,000 rounds of live ammunition at old trucks, washing machines and other faded symbols of American capitalism using fully automatic weapons. "It's really cathartic," said an unemployed man collecting government benefits who is somehow more stressed out than I could ever be.
And finally, in their first meeting with the Joe Maddon-managed Cubs since he swapped Cuban sandwiches for hot dogs with sport peppers on 'em, the Rays came out on top, 6-5. Trying hard, being a good sport and contributing to successful teamwork are all noble pursuits, but shutting down the guy who left you in the lurch in front of his new love interest? That's better than ice cream-flavored sex pizza.
This article appears in Jun 29 – Jul 7, 2017.