Sounds Straight Out of a Carl Hiaasen Novel

Wheeler-dealer political consultant Doug Guetzloe, who has been among the players under investigation in questionable deals of the Orlando-Orange County Expressway Authority (among other cases), is clearly a man who knows, as they say, where the bodies are buried. And now one of central Florida's great newshounds, intrepid Tony Pipitone of WKMG-TV, owns 80 cartons of Guetzloe's personal and professional papers! Guetzloe, y'see, failed to make a timely rental payment on his storage locker, and somebody not only bought the contents at auction for $10 but then gave them away to Pipitone provided he cart them away pronto, which Pipitone was deliriously happy to do. Guetzloe calls it all a setup, or out-and-out theft. [Orlando Sentinel] [WKMG-TV (Orlando)]

F State Prosecutors Need to Watch More "Law and Order"
Citrus County prosecutors botched the child-murder confessions of John Evander Couey by appearing deaf to his demands for a lawyer (and Orlando detectives questioned him about yet another case after fully understanding that he had, by that time, gotten a lawyer), and yet more incriminating statements may be thrown out in the case of David Onstott after he allegedly told Hillsborough prosecutors that he wanted a lawyer while being questioned about the disappearance of a 13-yr-old girl in 2005. Couey's prosecutors believe they have enough to go on without the confessions, but Onstott's prosecutors, not so much. And according to Onstott's lawyers, there is even a transcribed exchange among detectives demonstrating that they don't much care about his demand for a lawyer. [St. Petersburg Times]

Follow-Up
The Florida High School Athletic Ass'n has cleared Lakeland High School (er, state 5A champion Lakeland High School!) football star Chris Rainey [The F State, 12-8-2007] of accepting gifts, despite his gratuitous boasting for a December Miami Herald story that fans lavish money and jewelry on him all the time. ("When I walk around, people are buying me food, giving me money.") Rainey "recanted" all the statements, said FHSAA, and thus its hands are tied. So, let's translate. Rainey is a large-scale, insecure, boastful liar, not that there's anything wrong with that, under FHSAA regs. [Tampa Tribune]

More Things To Worry About Today
One of the several retired pro wrestlers in the Tampa Bay area, Dirty Dick Slater, was arrested again, for allegedly violating a domestic-assault stayaway order [St. Petersburg Times] . . . . . In a Miami-Dade school board fight between the black superintendent and several anti-Castro activists who want no favorable mention of Fidel in the schools, all sides were accused of being racists [WFOR-TV (Miami)] . . . . . James Lyons's good-sized home casino (e.g., $8k a table for poker) was busted in Jacksonville when he got mad about a home invasion and called the cops to come protect him and his customers [FirstCoastNews.com] . . . . . That service weapon the Hollywood police issued to Officer Michael McCarty apparently sure did come in handy when he got mad about a driver cutting him off in traffic [Miami Herald] . . . . . One of the state's worst mothers, Paula Tuck of Lakeland, who has already had 3 kids removed from her home for adoption, was sentenced to 15 months' probation for letting her 10-month-old drown in a bathtub while she, er, prepared a formula . . yeah, that's the ticket, prepared a formula [The Ledger (Lakeland)] . . . . . Broward sheriff's deputies and insurance investigators found 31 cars at the bottom of a canal along Griffin Road in Weston [Miami Herald] . . . . . Orlando cops like MySpace.com addict Robert Powell, 22, for a murder, basically because he posted on his page his condolences on the victim's passing, four hours before he turned up dead
[WESH-TV (Orlando)].

Scroll to read more News Feature articles
Join the Creative Loafing Tampa Bay Press Club

Local journalism is information. Information is power. And we believe everyone deserves access to accurate independent coverage of their community and state.
Help us keep this coverage going with a one-time donation or an ongoing membership pledge.

Newsletters

Join Creative Loafing Tampa Bay Newsletters

Subscribe now to get the latest news delivered right to your inbox.

We welcome readers to submit letters regarding articles and content in Creative Loafing Tampa Bay. Letters should be a minimum of 150 words, refer to content that has appeared on Creative Loafing Tampa Bay, and must include the writer's full name, address, and phone number for verification purposes. No attachments will be considered. Writers of letters selected for publication will be notified via email. Letters may be edited and shortened for space.

Email us at [email protected]