Stoking the flames of love

I apologize ahead of time that this post has nothing to do with nudity. But, if you're in a long term relationship like me, hopefully this post will be more helpful than photos of 18 year olds on Spring Break.

A new study published in the March issue of Review of General Psychology, proves that romantic love doesn't always die and get replaced by companionship love. This is good news for young couples wondering if their marriage can last, but bad for jaded couples hoping to justify divorce or cheating with the belief that romance always fades. However, lead researcher Dr. Bianca P. Acevedo, does make a distinction between romantic love and the mania/obsession of a new romance. "When taking a closer look, it seems like some people were still very much in love. They just weren't crazy."

So, if you're looking for a long term relationship that will keep you obsessing, panicking every time your partner doesn't return your text, and crying to your mother when he wants to have a boy's night, you're just going to have to find a new person each month to put up with your insanity.

Acevedo says that people often erroneously believe that romantic love and passionate love are the same. "Romantic love has the intensity, engagement and sexual chemistry that passionate love has, minus the obsessive component." She adds that passionate or obsessive love helps drive shorter relationships but not longer ones.

Acevedo and co-researcher Dr. Arthur Aron reviewed 25 studies with 6,070 individuals in short-and long-term relationships, classifying the relationships in each of the studies as romantic, passionate (romantic with obsession) or friendship-like love and categorized them as long-or short-term. Unsurprisingly, those who reported greater romantic love were more satisfied in their long-term relationships than those who classified their love as companion-like.

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