The Blotter

The Direct Approach: While en route to an unrelated call, a police officer observed a white Jeep in the intersection of 47th Street and Hillsborough Avenue. When the officer passed by the same spot a few minutes later, he noticed that the Jeep was still in the same position in the middle of the road. The middle-aged woman driver said she'd been at the Hard Rock Casino, where her purse was stolen. Per the report, she parked the car in the intersection, "because she could not drive without a license." Smelling a D.U.I., the officer asked for her date of birth, to which she responded "12/60." The cop asked again, got the same answer, and then informed the woman "that usually there is a day, month and year in a birth date." That informational hurdle cleared, the office tried for the woman's last name, which "also took her approximately 4 attempts" to nail down. Asked if she had been drinking, the woman responded, "Of course." Perhaps sensing that things were not about to go her way, the woman decided she just wanted to head home. The cop informed her that if she were found not to be under the influence, she could leave, to which she replied: "Of course I'm under the influence. I'm drunk!"

Use It Or Lose It: A Tampa man left his bike unattended outside a store on 15th Street in Tampa. After being inside for only a few minutes, he returned to find his ride had been stolen. The bike, a blue 21-speed mountain bike, sported "yellow graphics," "a light on the handle bars and a lock wrapped around the frame." I'll bet he didn't use all 21 speeds either.

Safe & Secure: Police recovered a stolen 2001 Dodge Caravan abandoned in a field in Tampa. An inspection of the vehicle revealed that the "ignition had been punched," and there were no attainable prints. Shame about the lack of evidence, especially since the cops were no doubt eager to catch this particular thief. The caravan was stolen from the parking lot of the Hillsborough County Sheriff's Office.

Hold The Phone: A mother and son standing on the balcony of their hotel witnessed a man enter a room down the hall, and shortly thereafter heard the sounds of a robbery. The pair wisely decided to hustle inside and wait for things to cool down. Unfortunately, in her haste the mother left her cell phone sitting on the balcony. Calls to the thief have apparently gone unreturned.From the files of the T.P.D.

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