The first kiss transmission device for virtual lovers (video)

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Presumably socially awkward men and sheltered teens everywhere are on the brink of hysterics now that they can be virtual make-out sluts, experiment with kissing members of the same sex, and avoid catching oral herpes or mono—assuming they don’t use communal devices—all without ever leaving the safety of their rooms.


Kisses can be recorded and saved for replay. This allows binary romantics to savor their virtual kisses or relive intimate moments with past lovers.


Undoubtedly this technology will quickly open the door to a marketplace of online entrepreneurs, celebrities, and porn stars willing to swap their lingual skills for cyber cash.


However, just as parents are unable to restrict the extracurricular activities of their teens’ tongues, the creators of this device will be unable to prevent users from incorporating this machine into every oral sex act imaginable: virtual cunnilingus, toe licking, rim jobs... When adult entertainers start selling “intimate kissing sessions,” Japanese manufacturers will have no choice but to proceed with their original plan to produce technologies that simulate other bodily orifices.



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  • Kiss Transmission Device

Japan is leading the world in progressing toward a future filled with fully automated relationships and virtual reality sex. Some Japanese resort towns have even started catering to men vacationing with virtual high school girlfriends. Now Japanese researchers are so close to simulating a physical relationship that they can taste victory—or at least they can taste the plastic toggle they’ve developed to simulate a lover's tongue.

The “kiss transmission device” fits in your mouth similar to the mouth guards psychiatric nurses used to force between the teeth of shock therapy patients. Once in place, the device records and transmits your tongue movements to a corresponding machine in your electronic lover’s mouth.

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