The proper reaction to a fake vagina... there isn't one

I had an interesting debate at dinner the other night. (sidenote: Yes, tragically these are the kinds of things my friends and I debate at dinner) My friend Daniel, a delightfully cynical Irish fellow was asking me about my vibrator.

How long had I had one? Where did I keep it? What does it look like? The longer this went on the more curious I got, why the sudden fascination? He said he had obviously seen them before as it seems most of us are not the best at hiding them anywhere OTHER than the night stand or underwear drawer. His question was not of their mere existence but almost the opposite.

Sure, men are aware that most women have a "little helper".... but what about men? My friend Daniel said he's rarely even had a one night stand where our toys didn't make a guest appearance, and of course, he was never disturbed by it but he pondered.... if a man had a toy... what would WE do?

I immediately admitted to being a total hypocrite and stated that if I found a fake vagina in my potential lovah's underwear drawer I would run out of there without my pants if I had to.

When I tried explaining this to Daniel, I used the automatic reference of a vibrators ability to VIBRATE and the sad fact that their penises... no matter how joyous it would be if they could, can not.

He was then quick to mention dildoes. I was stumped. I myself don't own a dildo because I fail to see the point when a vibrator takes no more than 5 minutes, on a bad day. But alas, I know many women who opt for them instead... so if that was an acceptable thing to find in among a woman's knickers, shouldn't we have to be accepting of the potential toys our male counterparts might opt for?

How far would this acceptance go? Would a "Real Doll" found in a closet no longer be cause for concern? Should we limit it to replica genitalia only? Are anuses off limits? Any boys out there actually own one? What the hell do you tell the ladies?! A little help, kids.

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