The Water Cooler: Fla. U.S. Senate field additions? And, the biggest sham in America.

Photo: Why is Ander Crenshaw smiling? Who is Ander Crenshaw?

The other day someone asked me, “so who would you rather see?” My snarky side wanted to respond “Mickey Mouse” as a better alternative than what we’ve currently got to consider. After thinking about it for a little while, here are my serious thoughts:

Sheriff Grady Judd. Judd is the no-nonsense sheriff of Polk County. I wrote about him more extensively in a previous column that you can read here. The problem with Grady Judd is, he’d get up in the U.S. Senate and go crazy watching the Senate “deliberate” (code for Senatorial hand wringing) over issues. Judd is a man of action. All the deliberating would probably cause him to end up shooting some fellow senators. The more I think about it, the U.S. Senate is probably not the place for Sheriff Judd. He’s probably better suited for the White House.

Congressman Ander Crenshaw. Crenshaw represents Jacksonville and other parts of North Florida. He’s an unassuming man with a respectable record as a fiscal conservative. Okay, that’s code for “he ain’t perfect” but let’s just say he’s far more accomplished than the current crop of candidates – or Marco Rubio for that matter. Crenshaw got his undergraduate degree from the University of Georgia and a law degree from the University of Florida. Don’t ask me what the hell he does on Georgia/Florida game day; but he’s a consummate politician and probably speaks out of both sides of his mouth, depending on which sideline he is on. Crenshaw has run statewide before (he ran for governor in ’94 losing in the primary to Jeb Bush) and previously served as president of the state Senate. Crenshaw was an investment banker for a national investment bank from 1990-1995. Don’t ask what he did before 1990, because his bio is mum on what he did outside of politics before then. But hey, no matter what he was doing, it had to be of greater substance than whatever Haridopolos or Hasner where doing at the time — since they were both in college then.

Congressman Vern Buchanan. Buchanan represents Sarasota and Manatee counties in what used to be Katherine Harris’ district. Buchanan has the itch to move up to higher office (he’s been mentioned for governor and U.S. Senate), but he lacks the cajones to take the plunge. Buchanan is a successful businessman and has a conservative voting record. His businesses have been the subject of several lawsuits, which his opponents would no doubt make issue of. But Buchanan could partially self-finance and he certainly should have enough D.C. connections to dwarf Hasner and Haridopolos in fundraising and the all-important television media buys that make or break statewide candidates.

State Senator Mike Bennett. Like Buchanan, Bennett hails from Sarasota/Manatee county area. He’s a navy veteran who served four tours in Vietnam while Hasner and Haridopolos were still in diapers. A graduate of Drake University, Bennett owns a very successful air conditioning and electrical contracting company as well as multiple real estate holdings in the area. I had lunch with Bennett one day and I offered to pick up the tab. As a member of the legislature, Bennett reminded me the rules don’t even allow me to buy him a cup of coffee. So I paid my share and he paid his. Or so I thought. Out in the parking lot a few minutes later he told me he owned the restaurant where we had just eaten. You’d think he would’ve offered to pick up my part of the tab! Alas, Bennett is frugal. That’s what we need in Congress. And no wonder rich people are rich.

Former Congressman and former Attorney General Bill McCollum. Okay, I’m just kidding. No really Bill, I’m just kidding. No Bill, seriously, you’re a three-time loser and a very sore loser at that. Bill, do not run again. Ever. For anything. Please!

What do you think? Are you satisfied with the current crop? Like any of the aforementioned? Who do you like?