Tips on hiding that hangover

My Bar Tab column this week is an instructional piece about obscuring the fact that you've just entered the workplace hung the fuck over, perhaps with plans to continue your buzz. Yep, bender time. I'm kinda on one right now. Whiskey Joe's had an awesome, highly attended private party bash yesterday from 5 p.m. to 9 p.m. We — as in me and my fellow felons — arrived around 6:15 and stayed well into the pay-for-your-drinks time. The food — burger sliders, pulled pork, oysters, calamari, chicken pizza, ribs and some other stuff I can't recall — was excellent, especially after all the free sparkling wine, cabernet, chardonnay, rum runners, pear martinis, beer and some steaming coffee-vodka combo that rocked. Anyway, here's a snippet from my latest Bar Tab:

Days like these separate the men from the boys, the women from the girls, the amateurs from the ombibulous pros. Because even seasoned drinkers surpass their stop sign on occasion. But, like the great high-ball warriors of old, we rise in the morning, start the coffee machine, jump in the shower and make sure we arrive at work on time. Because the first rule of hiding a hangover is not showing up late. That only draws added attention to the fact that your face looks like it just spent the night sandwiched between Kirstie Alley's ass cheeks.

Continue reading "How to hide your hangover at work."

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