Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster — Terran Version
Since its inception, Douglas Adams' The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy has garnered an almost rabid cult-like fan base, which has naturally established a rather strong toehold on the Web. Of course, it could be stuck, awaiting an electrically charged death by the Electric Spider of Doom or the Code Red Virus. Regardless, the Guide is a wholly remarkable book that says, "the best drink in existence is the Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster." How good? Well, "the effect of drinking a Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster is like having your brains smashed out by a slice of lemon wrapped around a large gold brick." The first thing that occurs to sick little monkeys like me is, "Screw the gin, let's drop a couple of those bad duckys down the hatch!" Alas, the ingredients for such a drink do not exist on this planet. However, a gentleman named Lloyd T. Rich, through what I'm sure was great personal peril (after all, the site says, "... he created a mixture similar to a Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster, after which, the bottom fell out of the jug." That is some SERIOUS Mojo) has devised an Earth version of the Galaxy's most renowned drink, complete with ingredients and mixing instructions. And it's a doozy; even I, a man of impaired judgment and less than functional self-preservation instincts, am a bit wary about its effects. But, if nothing else, it's a great way to confuse your bartender. Heh — order one and see what you get. Better yet, carry a printed copy and see if they can properly prepare one. And for those who think this site is a one-trick pony, it actually has two tricks. One is to make the drink. Two is to survive its consumption. Remember where your towel is and drink ... but ... very ... carefully.
—Patrick J. Graney