THE OSCARS SNOOZE-A-RAMA
Meth addicts on Hollywood Boulevard nodded off trying to watch it.
MARTIN SCORSESE
About freakin' time.
ALAN ARKIN
About freakin' time.
HOLLYWOOD POLITICS
On strength of recent wins, Al Gore and Dixie Chicks announce new film together, I'm Really the President, and These Are My First Ladies.
AN INCONVENIENT TRUTH
It's a damned slide show, for God's sake. Who's going to win Best Documentary next year, my Uncle Harry for Hawaiian Vacations in the '60s?
FOREST WHITAKER
C'mon, admit it, the eye thing is a little freaky.
JACK NICHOLSON'S SHAVED HEAD
Clearly an homage to Britney. Or the other way around.
JAMES CAMERON 'FINDS' TOMB OF JESUS
Does this mean we don't get to bite the heads off of chocolate rabbits once a year anymore?
VILSACK DROPS OUT OF PRESIDENTIAL RACE
Well, well, this changes everything.
COUNCIL ON FOREIGN RELATIONS TAPS ANGELINA JOLIE
Members of prestigious foreign policy brain trust cite her "U.N. work, international advocacy and fabulous tits" in announcing they've offered her membership.
