Good morning! Let's kick off another week by refusing to let go of the weekend directly previous, shall we?
FRIDAY, FEB. 2:
A 43-year-old Riverview man was arrested outside a Lana Del Rey concert at Orlando's Amway Center with a knife in his pocket after someone brought some social media posts of his with a decidedly stalker-ish vibe to the attention of authorities. "Our queen forever in both worlds"? Yeah, probably a good call.
A supporter of America's armed forces announced that he wants to create an underwater memorial consisting of statues of famous soldiers underwater just off Dunedin Beach. The proposed feature, consisting of 24 six-foot figures in a 100-foot circle around a central monument, will also serve to trick distant future generations into thinking there didn't used to be water there, because that's automatically what we think when we find stuff like this now.
A Hernando County idiot arrested for breaking into a funeral home in the early morning hours of Friday and stealing items — including "a tub" of formaldehyde — told cops he did it because he was "bored." No way this dude has already gotten through everything on Netflix yet.
SUNDAY, FEB. 4:
And finally, the Straz Center for the Performing Arts announced that obscure, innovative American Revolution rap battle play Hamilton will bow in Tampa beginning Feb. 12, 2019. Start devising your convoluted and ultimately fruitless plans for getting your hands on tickets now, people.