American Idol Top 12 Recap: We get it, "Big Mike" and Crystal are amazing...can we be done now?

Why are we even here? Seriously, American Idol...why am I still watching you this season? You have forsaken me. Last week's results show was the first time in my long and sordid history with Idol that I actually believed we need a "judges' override." There is no way in hell or heaven or earth that Katie Stevens and Paige Miles should have made it into the illustrious top 12. This. Is. Crap. Yet here I am, glued to my television for another two hours, putting off my DVRed episode of Lost and holding onto that last bit of hope I have, that maybe this week, Americans will stop being such dimwits and get it right.

The top 12 does bring us a bigger stage, a larger audience, a normal-sized (his usual stature of "mini") Ryan Seacrest and a slightly less train-wrecky set of performances.

Recapping and bitching commences after the jump...