Before we get to the review of Red Riding Hood, let's talk about period films. There are certain things that shouldn't exist in a universe meant to be somewhere in Europe sometime in the middle ages. They include, but are not limited to:

Thick American accents

Booty dancing

GMILFs

Hair gel

Call me a stickler, but it sort of takes me out of the moment when the rugged love interest is rocking the Zach Braff coif and stately adults are using words like "gonna."

This article appears in Mar 10-16, 2011.