When Netflix first started streaming the Canadian hit mockumentary-style television show Trailer Park Boys, my mind flashbacked to my tiny, pot smoke-filled Los Angeles studio in which two guy friends watched the movie Super Troopers over and over and over. And over. My relationship with the Boys started off a similar way.
My boyfriend and another close male friend started watching the Trailer Park Boys in our living room, again, over and over and over. Though I still have yet to watch Super Troopers, I could not ignore the antics of the criminally sweet Ricky, Julian, Bubbles and the rest of the relentlessly high and drunk gang at the Sunnyvale Trailer Park. I have been a dear fan since.
Though the show has been off the air since 2008, with the second feature film Countdown to Liquor Day following, the Boys have earned major cult status since in America. They even performed at the cooler-than-thou Sasquatch! Festival in Seattle, among the likes of Foo Fighters and Archers of Loafers.
Superfan Tom Murray and I talked recently with Robb Wells, John Paul Tremblay and Mike Smith in character as Ricky, Julian and Bubbles respectively. The trio talked about their new tour, Kittyland, swish and life in general as a Trailer Park Boy.
SP: How’s the tour going?
Julian: Going great, we’re selling out all the shows. It’s going good. We’re getting drunk every night. Perfect tour.
How are you guys liking the American fame? Are we treating you okay here?
Julian: Yeah, we had no idea we had so many fans down here. So far, it’s been awesome. We sold out every show. Everyone’s been great.
So we’re in Tampa, I don’t know if you know anything about Tampa. You’ll be here Oct. 20. I think you’ll enjoy our little city. We are the birthplace of Hooters and we have very famous strip clubs.
Ricky: Awesome.
Do you guys have specific things on your rider?
Ricky: We sure do. We got a 40-ouncer of Rum, a 40-ouncer of Jack Daniels, a bottle of Patron tequila, 24 beers, four bottles of red wine, two bottles of white wine, four pairs of socks, 36 condoms, two prostitutes, a carton of smokes from Canada, Flairs Lights. And we usually try to get some dope but sometimes that doesn’t happen — sometimes it does happen.
While you’re out, are you worried that Cyrus might reestablish himself in the park and if so what measures are you prepared to take?
Ricky: He better not, I can’t stand that bastard. If tries to come back in our park there’s going to be hell to pay when we get back to Sunnyvale.
Bubbles, do you have any kitties with you?
Bubbles: I have two kitties with me. I have Sgt. Galenstine’s red thing and Shitrock. Sgt. Galenstine he’s my friend from Thomasville he’s a Sgt. And Shitrock, he’s the comptroller
Did anyone else bring something from home with them on tour?
Bubbles: Julian brought his favorite picture of Patrick Swayze that he lights candles around and stares into his eyes every night before bed.
Julian: Not true.
Bubbles: And Ricky brought several pairs of Lucy’s underwear.
Speaking of Lucy, all the single ladies in Tampa want to know how your relationship statuses are.
Bubbles: Well I’m single and ready to get it going.
I’m ready to get it out and let the ladies go at it.
Feeling frisky?
Bubbles: Yes ma’am!
Ricky: I’m actually single as well right now. … Lucy ended up cheating on me again with somebody. And it just, yeah, we’re trying to work through it but I’m single for the tour.
Well that’s good to be on tour and be single, I guess. Even with a broken heart. …
Julian?
Julian: Yeah, I’m totally looking for a lady. Hopefully I’ll bring one back to Sunnyvale.
Julian, how do you make swish?
Julian: Take a dirty old rum barrel float some water in; let it sit for about two weeks.
Turn it every two weeks. And in about two months you have this liquor. It tastes like shit but gets you really fucked up.
Ricky, do you prefer hot knifes or 10 paper joints?
Ricky: Uh, that’s a tough one. I’ll have to go with 10 paper joints. Hot knifes are good but there a little harsh, you need to put them through some ice.
We recently saw our friend Sebastian Bach's house got ruined by Hurricane Irene. Is he going to come live with you guys, you think?
Ricky: He’s welcome to. Yeah that really sucked, I felt bad for him
Yeah, that did suck. I saw all of his Kiss memorabilia floated down the street.
Ricky: Yeah, that’s horrible.
Bubbles, where did the term dicklock come from?
Bubbles: Dicklock was a thing I invented when I was about 12. It was underwear I used to put on with a big padlock on the front of it. You know, I was testing theories and what not. I tried to patent the dicklock but they wouldn’t give me patent on it.
How are the rest of the guys in Sunnyvale doing?
Bubbles: Everybody’s pretty good. Lahey and Randy are still driving around the park.
Lahey drinking again?
Bubbles: Yes, he’s drinking again. He’s trying to eat more liquor now. He pours liquor on all his food and eats it.
Like flambé without the flambé.
Bubbles: Yeah, pretty much. He’ll just take a loaf of bread and just soak it liquor and just eat the loaf.
How’s J-Roc’s rap career coming?
Bubbles: He’s doing pretty good. He’s traveling around the country right now looking for Eminen. He’s tying to find Eminem and get some dope for him.
Speaking of Eminen, if you could fight any celebrity in the world who would it be?
Ricky: Danny McBride.
Bubbles: I wouldn’t mind fighting Jackie Chan myself.
Oh yeah, we just watched a little clip of one of your live shows. Did you ever get into that Jackie Chan movie?
Bubbles: I’m still trying. He’s extended the deadline by a few weeks so I’m still trying.
And one more Celebrity? Julian?
Julian: Anyone in Jersey Shore, in that show. I’d like to take on all of them actually.
All at once? I’ve got 10 bucks on you.
Julian: Thanks man. I could easily knock those guys out. Crazy bastards.
When you guys get done with tour, I assume you’d want a couple weekends to relax, get used to being at home again. Do you have any more business ventures on the table, something you’d like to do?
Ricky: For me wintertime is starting so I’ll be getting all my hydroponics operations up and running. If it gets too cold, I’ll just probably go to jail.
Ricky, what are the lot fees when you’re living out of your car?
Ricky: Well, there’s not really supposed to be any lot fees that’s one of the reasons I live there. They try and gouge me with something, usually a 30 to 40 dollar water fee. That’s it.
How many pepperonis do you think you consume in one day?
Ricky: I’d say 16 to 20 inches.
Bubbles: They’re actually measured in cocks so that’s about five cocks of pepperoni a day.
Speaking of cocks, besides Rush and yourselves, who is your favorite Canadian celebrity.
Bubbles: I’ll tell you right now, I’m not ashamed to say it. I’ve got fucking Bieber fever.
Yes, I’ve been diagnosed with full-fledged Bieber fever.
Are there any questions you guys would like to ask us about Tampa or the state of Florida since you’ll be here soon? Are you guys going to go to Disney World?
Ricky: Will it be warm there? Are the liquor stores open on Sunday?
Bubbles: Are there any rub-n-tugs in town? Rub n tugs, you know where you go get a massage and they tug your bird.
Oh yeah, tons of them. We have the J spas. Kennedy and South Dale Mabry.
Bubbles: Fantastic.
But stay away from Nebraska Avenue, where there are men dressed as women.
Bubbles: Jesus Murphy.
Unless you like that, you might want to stay away.
Bubbles: No, I’ll steer clear of there. I like to go where there are real actual ladies tugging on your bird not men.
Bubbles, do you see Steve French anymore?
Bubbles: I haven’t seen him in a while. There’s been reports of him around. He’s definitely off the weed now so he’s a little more angry than he used to be.
Are there any outtakes of the Adult movies available online anywhere we can see?
Bubbles: There probably is some outtakes. I mean there was one take where I almost got my bird snapped in half.
Julian, what is your recipe for potato vodka?
Julian: Oh shit, I can’t tell you that ’cause then you’ll probably end up making it. I make a lot of money each year making potato vodka.
Have you guys seen any American trailer parks while you’ve been out on the road and if so, what do you think of them?
Julian: Yeah we’ve seen a few. It’s quite a bit different down here. I mean, some of them are crazy and they kind of scare us and some of them are just a bunch of old people. It’s definitely a lot different then Sunnyvale.
Julian, do you get arm cramps from holding your glass 24/7?
Julian: No I’ve been drinking since the age of 6 or 7 so.
Bubbles: No, he gets arm cramps from cranking off though.
What’s the most you’ve seen anyone in the park drink?
Julian: Well, Lahey has passed out in a tub full of Liquor and he woke up and it was gone. The drain was still plugged so I mean he drank a tub full of booze. He probably pissed in it and everything cause he was in there for about 13 or 14 hours.
Bubbles, are you still refurbishing shopping carts?
Bubbles: Yes, I’m still doing them, it’s not as easy anymore though cause everybody’s fucking think it’s cool now to haul shopping carts.
How’s Shitty Bill, and does he still help you out with that?
Bubbles: Yeah, shitty broke his leg a couple of weeks ago so he’s been laid up. …He tumbled down a bank all fuckin’ tangled up. Fuckin’ almost tore his leg off.
Was he drunk?
Bubbles: Yes, he was drunk.
Is Kittyland still open?
Bubbles: It is still open. It’s running pretty good now that Rickey got garbage land out of there.
Who do you have looking after your kitties while you’re on the road?
Bubbles: I’ve got several people that go around. I’ve got one person that feeds them and one lady that comes over and does belly work on them.
Ricky, do you know how much hash you consumed at the hash hockey game with bubbles?
Ricky: Usually, just a gram or two.
Is there any kind of a specific American souvenir you’d like to bring back with you from your tour of the states?
Ricky: Yeah, probably three trophy women.
We got them in Florida.
Ricky: I heard that.
When you’re in Tampa next door to where you are performing is a bar called The Hub. There it’s full with people like yourselves, drunk, high and unemployed. We would appreciate it if you would stop by … and lead us.
Ricky: That sounds good. Maybe we’ll have our after party there.
That would be amazing. We would love to have you there. … Bubbles, you could probably get rub and tugs that you wouldn’t have to pay for. I’m sure.
Bubbles: Fantastic.
This article appears in Oct 13-19, 2011.