BARDI: "I actually enjoy forming my own opinions…"
1. The first three films are legendary, and Raiders of the Lost Ark is a true classic
The original Indy trilogy — 1981's Raiders of the Lost Ark (now called Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark — Lucasfilm's marketing department must have sent a memo about consistency), 1984's Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom and 1989's Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade — followed Star Wars' lead in reintroducing the serial cliffhanger into the film lexicon. While all three films are worthwhile, Raiders has been elevated to a classic in recent years, and with good reason. The sarcastic hero, sassy female lead, travelogue feel and special effects-laden finale are all elements that have been rehashed repeatedly since Raiders first ripped them off in the early '80s. In today's world, that's originality.
2. The Internet critics have spoken, and the new movie sucks
Save your $10, Tampa Bay. Someone claiming to be a "U.S. theater executive" and sporting the handle "ShogunMaster" apparently saw Indy 4 at an early industry screening and hated it. The anonymous review, posted to the website Ain't It Cool News, filleted the movie, saying, "This is the Indiana movie that you were dreading." That verdict only makes me want to see it more. Sure, I could treat a screed from a glorified popcorn salesman as if it were a new Gene Siskel review pounded out on God's golden keyboard and e-mailed direct from Heaven, but I actually enjoy forming my own opinions.
3. I'm secretly hoping whips and fedoras become the hot fashion accessories of 2008
Picture it: A suburban high school in Anytown, U.S.A. Students are jawing in the hallway between classes, random paper is flying about, and scores of kids are sporting wide-brimmed hats and thwacking each other in the butt with leathery bull whips. OK, it's probably not a likely scenario, but neither was an entire generation of women donning men's ties and baggy trousers after they saw Annie Hall. If Indy 4 goes on to make a gazillion dollars this summer, anything is possible.
4, Nobody does action movies like Steven Spielberg
Back in his heyday, no one pulled off an action sequence like Mr. Spielberg. The director has the most distinctive visual flair of his generation and the best special effects house on the planet (buddy George's Industrial Light and Magic) at his beck and call. Jaws defined high-seas adventure for the modern era, Raiders featured one of the all-time great chases in cinema history (the one where Indy gets shot and dragged behind a truck), and Jurassic Park not only gave us convincing dinosaurs, but showed them doing interesting things in exciting ways (the T-rex SUV attack, raptors hunting two kids in a kitchen, etc.). Today's action movies thrive on quick cutting and frenetic action (think the Bourne movies), so I'm interested to see if Spielberg can stay true to his vision while kicking things up a notch for those born after 1989.
5. The supporting cast is solid
By now, we all know what to expect from the Indiana Jones character. As long as Harrison Ford plasters on his famous smirk, slips on the proper jacket and hat, and utters at least three dry and witty remarks while hanging off a cliff by his fingernails, most film fans will be content. That means it's up to the new faces in the cast to make the latest Indy feel fresh and exciting. Indy 4 livens things up with the always-reliable Cate Blanchett as Indy's dominatrix-clad Russian nemesis, and fast-talking Shia LaBeouf as Indy's son, er, young counterpart. Add in the return of spunky Raiders heroine Karen Allen, and the mix of old and new characters seems whip smart.
SALVEGGI: "Some movies are meant to be seen in a crowded theater on opening night…"
6. Nostalgia.
Raiders of the Lost Ark sparked my desire to become a globetrotting adventurer when I saw the film as a 10-year-old in 1981, tapping into my predisposition toward the romance of archaeology while ratcheting up the fun. Shoot bad guys! Jump on moving vehicles! Close your eyes when the Holy Spirit rises out of the Ark! After leaving the theater, I, like thousands of other impressionable boys, wanted to be Indiana Jones, living life as the star in my own personal adventure worthy of cinematic spectacle. Seeing a new Indy movie is partly an exercise in remembering what it's like to be young, innocent and naïve enough to think you can survive riding on the back of a Nazi submarine.
7. John Williams' "Raiders March."
As integral to the enduring appeal of the films as Indy and his hair's-breadth escapes is John Williams' rousing "once you start humming it you can't stop" theme music. In fact, one of the inspirations for this column came when I heard the fanfare playing on Associate Editor Joe Bardi's computer, and I popped my head up like a meerkat over the cubicle partition to see what was going on — a new trailer perhaps? A personal message from Harrison Ford inviting the good folks at Creative Loafing to an advance screening? Alas, no, but just hearing those majestic few bars made my day a little bit better.
8. Can Spielberg/Lucas do it again?
Raiders of the Lost Ark, a cheeky adventure with one outlandish action sequence after another, set the bar unattainably high for the rest of the series. And while the sequels haven't quite measured up, neither have they tarnished the legacy of their progenitor. Spielberg et al aren't expected to capture lightning in a bottle again, but there's the hope that, after a 19-year layoff, they'll be able to conjure up some of that Indy magic. I'm just hoping they give as at least as decent a ride as The Last Crusade. OK, I'm hoping for quite a bit more than that.
9. Indy is the iconic Harrison Ford role.
What about Han Solo, you say? Well — what about him? Sure, Ford put his indelible stamp on Star Wars' roguish, rakish space pirate. But the SW films (at least the first three) were overflowing with mythical characters you could choose as your favorite. And let's face it, by Return of the Jedi, Ford had grown tired of the role, even trying to convince George Lucas to kill him off at the end of The Empire Stikes Back. The Indiana Jones series, on the other hand, relies almost entirely on Ford's charm, charisma and the ability to convey a hero who's just a human as those in the theater, giving us a character we want to root for.
10. It's communal!
Some movies are meant to be seen in a crowded theater on opening night. Like every new Bond movie or Die Hard installment, much of the joy in watching Indiana Jones comes from the shared adrenaline rush of seeing our hero make one death-defying escape after another. A new Indy movie isn't just a run-of-the-mill summer blockbuster; it's an event. So dust off that fedora, throw on your leather bomber jacket, and I'll see you opening night.
This article appears in May 21-27, 2008.