Starbucks biggest problem — besides its signature burned coffee — has always been the lack of savory treats available for a nosh. It's difficult to spend six hours in a coffee shop working on your never-to-be-published novel or playing internet poker with only slabs of lemon poundcake or tiny packets of sweetened almonds for sustenance. Even just a bagel and packet of Philly cream cheese would have been enough.

In the midst of its ongoing financial woes and loss of market share, Starbucks has been groping about for any possible way to drive people back to the stores. Extended hours, pseudo-free wifi, no decaf after Noon and now, finally, savory sandwiches at almost all locations, with breakfast "value meals" that start today.

After tasting every piece of savory food on the menu, all I can ask is: "Dear God, Starbucks, why?!"

This article appears in Mar 4-10, 2009.