I watched a rented DVD of Woody Allen's Cassandra's Dream last night, a film which instantly goes into the pantheon of worst Woody flicks ever.
But that's not the point of this post. The point is … I was not watching American Idol. When it comes to that wretched spectacle, I'm a conscientious objector. I find the show, the very idea of the show, abhorrent. If I had last night to do over again, I would watch neither, but given the choice between just the two, I would stick with Cassandra's Dream.
OK, I'm not the first Idol hater out there. But I've never spoken up before, and with the program in its eighth season, I realized I got some shit to say. I've watched a few episodes, mostly partial episodes, over the years, so feel qualified to comment. (Hell, I would've anyway.)
My beef with Idol is not the circus atmosphere; the wacky (Abdul) or cruel (Cowell) judges; or the gimmicky device early in the season of showing the tone-deaf hacks, which I've always suspected are plants (I understand Idol has backed off showing those clowns a bit). It's not even so much that even the good singers come from a cookie-cutter mold of safe, vaguely soul-oriented music (I read that one girl performed "Sittin' on the Dock of the Bay" last night).
It's that American Idol is a creativity killer. The show is the quickest avenue to pop stardom, and it has a disproportionate influence defining American mainstream music. As they say, we reap what we sow. In this case, bland, bland, bland. Same, same, same. If there were a program where singer/songwriters performed their own music in a contest format, and the judges used creativity as a criterion, I'd give it a look-see. (Who knows; there may have already been one that failed.)
Certainly some of Idol's late-round contestants have singing chops, but I've never seen an ounce of originality from them. They know the drill, the follow the blueprint.
I can't really blame Cowell and the rest for cashing in on such a lasting phenomenon. It's really the public's fault. The masses are allowing themselves to be manipulated and dumbed down. The rest of us, those of us with some taste, reject the show as glitzy karaoke (or watch it as camp).
Some of you may now be thinking: Oh jeez, the rantings of an elitist music critic. There may be a little truth to that. (Let me add, though, that I've always liked a lot of mainstream stuff.) Still, I resolutely believe that American Idol is a destructive, or at least stagnating, force in American, make that global, pop music. Those of us with a conscience should refuse to watch. It just may help the show go away quicker.
This article appears in Jan 14-20, 2009.