Sometimes I wonder about people. Even myself. I’m the type of woman where if I want to have sex, I’m having sex. When I was younger I would go out and pick up the first sexy man I saw who I thought would be a good fuck. Now I just get online and can have someone over in a matter of minutes, if I wanted. I usually start with emails back and forth. Then it escalates to text messages and finally to fucking.
In the 17 years I’ve spent picking up men , never have I had someone steal from me. At least not until a couple of nights ago. I met Javon online. He was young, sexy and ready to fuck. 3 of my most basic requirements. The conversations we had got me hot and wet like lava. Once he sent me a picture of his gigantic cock, I was hooked. It was time I let him come over and make me cum.
Our first encounter went so well, I let him come back again. I should have left him a one hit wonder. It maybe my fault for originally telling him he could stay over and we could fuck all night long. I even went out and bought a brand new box of Trojan Magnum Condoms just so we could. I always by the Magnums. I have a specific type of guy that I fuck. Big cock and broke. What a trade off. What can I say, big cocks make me cum, big wallets don‘t.
After his gigantic cock made me cum a couple of times, it was time for him to go. I wasn’t turned on enough to let him stay. Turns out he was pretty pissed about not staying the night. So pissed he snatched up the leftover condoms right out of box. After he left, I started putting up the toys and leftover condoms, only there weren’t any. This sorry son of a bitch stole my condoms. What kind of broke dick sorry mother fucker steals the leftover condoms after he’s done fucking someone? Not only aren’t condoms cheap, but it’s like paying him to fuck me.
Of course he denied taking them. Okay, it was only two of us in the house. Not even my dog was here to eat them. Who else would have taken them? Fucking Casper the friendly ghost trying to get friendlier? The Invisible Fucking Man, wanting to wrap his invisible cock so he could see it for a change? I’m not buying it. I’m also not buying anymore condoms. From now on if a guy wants to fuck me, he has to bring his own condoms.
Funny thing is Javon tried calling and texting me last night, wanting to hook up. Um, just how stupid does he think I am? What would he steal this time, my glasscock?
This article appears in Jan 20-26, 2010.
