Ryan Delafield finally, after nine months, got an official law-enforcement explanation of the death of his aunt, Emily Delafield, 56, in Green Cover Springs. She was swinging a knife and a hammer, and the two GCS Police officers were afraid of her. "[C]onsistent with their training," the report says, they Tasered her at least 10 times. Key fact: The officers reported they Tasered her five and four times, respectively; their weapons' download counters say one and nine, respectively. [FirstCoastNews.com]

News That Florida Rape Victims Can Use: Go to a Crisis Center, Not a Hospital Two SoFlo legislators are sponsoring a bill to require that emergency morning-after pills be available for all rape victims because the record right now is spotty. In the meantime, according to the Florida Council Against Sexual Violence, crisis centers are much more likely to offer them than hospitals. [Miami Herald]

The Hardest-Luck Story You'll See Today . . . Except for the One Right After It Marcia Baird of Fort Lauderdale says she is contemplating legal action against the surgeon whose liposuctioning apparently included allowing a little necrotizing fasciitis (flesh-eating bacteria) to take hold, and she's finally able to function after two years of hell. (The doc's name is J. Howard Tiller.) How awful. Except there is Timothy Carmack of Hudson, who now knows that he caught a little lymphatic filariasis, most likely from a bug bite while he was fighting in Vietnam. He has been plagued with super-painful bloating for three decades, and the VA couldn't figure out why. He finally got a knowledgeable diagnosis, but he's disabled by the pain and besides, there's all that yellowish ooze seeping from his skin. [WPLG-TV (Miami)]
[St. Petersburg Times]

Floridians With Worse Sex Lives Than You Registered sex offender Michael Anderson, 46, was arrested again, in Orange County, and charged with stalking an elderly woman, and, while she was away, breaking into her Captain Morgan Blvd. home and having his way with himself all over her clothes. Helpfully for their investigation, said detectives, Anderson was a journaler. [WKMG-TV (Orlando)]

Your Daily Loser Yr Editor thought Catherine Lafreniere was the loser last week [The F State, 2-7-2007], accused of stealing $3,000 from her kids' high school booster club in Melbourne. She now appears to have been trumped by Cheryl Foster-Lawrentz, 32, who has been charged with embezzling $9,500 from the senior class at Tampa's Chamberlain High, for which she was faculty advisor. (Oh, the community's pitching in, so the kids won't suffer.) [St. Petersburg
Times]

More Things To Worry About Today Habitat for Humanity has a nice-looking home in south St. Petersburg, with a zero-percent mortgage, but so far all nine offerees have rejected it because of the 'hood [St. Petersburg Times] . . . . . "I have no medical training and no qualifications," said the lead executioner-torturer of the late Angel Diaz, testifying to a panel investigating why the state can't kill people properly [Associated Press via Orlando Sentinel] . . . . . "People aren't being trained to be pedestrians," said a Florida Atlantic professor, explaining why our state perennially has the highest rate of pedestrian fatalities [South Florida Sun-Sentinel] . . . . . Pillars of the Community, Gone Bad: Navarre civic volunteer Bruno Cannella, 38, was charged with 36 counts of sex with a teenage boy, and high-profile lawyer Robert Walker, 59, was charged with attempted murder for trying to quiet a neighborhood Super Bowl party in tony Belleair with his sidearm [BayNews9 (Tampa-St.Petersburg)] . . . . . A woman gone wild, charged with beating her boyfriend about the head with her high-heel shoe, and of course her name is Kari Barefoot [Tampa Tribune] . . . . . Steven Stein of Clearwater believes with all his heart that he inadvertently purchased what was Walt Disney's very first illustration of Mickey (or Mortimer) Mouse, from the 1920s (based on paper- and ink-dating), and he's suing Disney for $50M for . . . well . . . for, uh . . . I'm not sure why; he just is [WTVT (Tampa)].

This article appears in Feb 7-13, 2007.