After reading Rebecca’s 10 Reasons you might be a swinger, I realized I am one. I’ve toyed with this thought like I’ve toyed with hard cock; let it amuse me but never take it seriously. I fit 5.5 of the 10 listed reasons. (the half reason is because I know what Viagra is but the limp dicks I’ve tried fucking, apparently don’t!).
Is it possible though that a Single, Straight, Female can be a swinger? Usually the thought of a single female swinger is the bi-sexual female, The Unicorn, come to fuck the wife so the husband can watch or stroke her from behind as she eats out the wifey. But I’m not bi. I don’t want to fuck women, just men. Lots and lots of sexy men. There are men that I’m attracted to who I just want to fuck, not date. There are men I date who I like to get to know before sex. This way if the man I want to date has dick issues, like too small, won’t get hard, or he exaggerated the size so much that when he whips it out, I say “What’s that,” I’m more likely to continuing seeing him then if we just jumped in the sack. I need the opportunity to develop feelings for him before that happens. If he can’t stimulate my mind or fuck me hard, then what’s the point in keeping him around? Because he looks good? Because he has money? Because he provides stability? That’s all bullshit fed to woman to keep us behind men, not beside them. This is why 20 years ago I’d be considered a slut, not a swinger.
I feel this way toward men because I don’t develop interpersonal relationships with most of them. I can take out everything but the sex in with my fuck buddies. I have standards for sex, but I have even higher standards for dating. This isn’t strange or wrong to me, but for a lot of woman they date more men than they fuck. If I’m going to date someone then I’m going to share more than just my vagina. I’m going to share my heart, my soul, my life, my family, my friends. I’m going to share all of these things which mean a lot more to me than sex, with someone I date. This is why I date less men than I fuck. Until I can meet a man who makes me want to share those pieces of my life, I’ll continue taking applications and enjoying each and every interview. I guess I better add “Are you a swinger” to the application.
This article appears in Dec 2-8, 2000.