Welcome to Tuesday, your weekly opportunity to fail to make up for Monday's lack of productivity, thus ensuring that Wednesday will likewise suck.
Two workers became stranded on a scaffolding 80 feet in the air on the side of the Times building in downtown St. Pete, and were safely brought down by St. Pete Fire & Rescue. "That's not very exciting news," said everybody except two workers who became stranded on a scaffolding 80 feet in the air on the side of the Times building.
Tampa traffic finally became a literal dump truck fire yesterday evening when a dump truck fire closed I-275 in both directions around Fletcher Avenue. Pretty soon the universe is going to stop being so subtle about trying to tell us to update the way we get around, and just start hurling meteorites at the I-4 interchange.
Regionally set reality show Siesta Key continues to contend with issues above and beyond simply being a terrible idea poorly executed, thanks to another shark-related video that reportedly shows a principal member of "the cast" shooting a hammerhead shark, which is illegal in Florida waters. Note to the cast and crew of Siesta Key: The universe doesn't like your show. Watch out for meteorites.
And finally, yesterday in horrifying WTF news, an Australian kid had his feet partially eaten by tiny marine mites so small that at first it just seemed like the ocean itself was trying to kill him. Our sincerest condolences to all Australians, for whom clear shallow water right by the shore was the last semi-safe place between all the murdery things on their land and all the murdery things in their sea.
This article appears in Aug 3-10, 2017.