Universe: Hey, Scott, you and your co-workers really busted your asses again this year putting together the Best of The Bay Issue. What would you like to do now that it's over?
Scott: Well, now that I've got a little time, I'd really like to go fishing.
Universe: Oh. Fishing, you say? (Looks over shoulder at massive new red tide bloom and fish kill) Oh, that's… that's unfortunate.
Also unfortunate: The Lightning lost their first preseason game, falling 3-2 to Carolina. It's not the end of the world though, and anyway, the real reason for this year's preseason games is to get fans acclimated to the snarled and infuriating downtown traffic conditions brought on by current development before the real action starts.
Sarasota is a finalist for the title of "Happiest Seaside Town 2017." Part-time area resident Stephen King oughta be able to turn that premise on its head in short order…
SeaWorld announced it's bringing "at least 5 new experiences" to its flagging Orlando theme park as part of an $175 million-dollar investment in turning the brand's fortunes around. Would've been a lot cheaper to just drain everything and turn it into a skatepark and "rage catharsis experience' in which folks pay to don safety gear and smash up everything in the gift shops.
And finally, Tyson recalled 130,000 pounds of chicken nuggets because they might include "foreign material." As if all Tyson chicken nuggets don't.
This article appears in Sep 22-29, 2016.