Beginning with a duet (or what is it a duel?) between the god and goddess of glitter, Elton John and Lady Gaga, this year's interminable Grammy show was a parade of arranged marriages, most of them doomed. (Photos from grammy.com/Wireimage.com)
Gaga and John. Actually, this pair played nicely off each other's piano stylings and histrionic wailings; it was kinda touching to watch Elton hand over the mantle of fabulosity to Gaga in their duet of "This Is Your Song." But, side note: Gaga's "Poker Face" choreography set a militaristic tone at the start of the evening that never let up: What was it with all the storm troopers, ammo belts and epaulets? A tribute to our troops? Or maybe to Michael Jackson?
Stephen Colbert and daughter. No, you did not look cool, and your daughter did not look comfortable. In fact, the whole "Am I cool?" bit succeeded in doing the impossible: It actually made Stephen Colbert seem uncool.
Maxwell and Roberta Flack. Sad. Maxwell flitting from octave to octave while the august but awkward Flack erased memories of all her past triumphs with a wobbly upper register and a big finish repeating one syllable that sounded like "Hi."
This article appears in Jan 27 – Feb 2, 2010.