It Happened this Week-ish: Megan Fox is kind of bitchy, Nicole Richie's baby bird, Ellen is the new Paula, the VMAs on Twitter and more

He has none, but a few members his crew wrote a special little letter about her unique level of crazy-bitch. As if it is news to America that she lacks class and grace. She was engaged to Brian Austin-Green, she thinks she might be schizophrenic and instead of telling a doctor she told the press, and she has the verbal filter of an open window. She shames our generation...p.s., we have some topless pics of her here...just in case you were curious.

*There are so many things wrong with this article about Lindsey Lohan. 1. Someone has given her a new job. Bad Idea. 2. Her title is artistic advisor, and I am pretty sure the only thing she can advise on is the correct alcohol to cocaine ratio to seem almost kinda sorta normal for the paparazzi. 3. She has been described as a "leggings designer." Is that a real thing?

That brings us to sentence three, dear god, these people worry me.

*Nicole Richie and that one guy from Good Charlotte are parents....again. I only care because they named him Sparrow and anyone who is famous enough to name their child something that ridiculous deserves a mention. Congrats, Nicole and guy whose name I still can't remember, you have condemned yet another child to a life of answering the question "I'm sorry, what's your name??"


*Fashion week is upon us and with it comes a barrage of photographs of stars in the best and worst of styles. The worst: Rihanna. Are those studded? Does that mean I can get them at Hot Topic? Is she hiding a black eye? Too soon? Too predictable? My apologies.

*Ellen is replacing Paula Abdul as the 4th judge on American Idol this season. Don't worry your pretty little heads my unemployed friends, her daytime show will still be on the air as well. She is a busy lady this Ellen, but I guess she needs to be, Portia isn't exactly bringing in the big bucks with her starring roles. Oh wait, that Arrested Development movie is back on...ok, so they are just going to be uber-rich now.

*The MTV VMAs were Sunday night and it was everything I hoped for. You can catch my full recap here but for now, I will simply leave you with the Tweet of the VMAs from @Pink: "Kanye west is the biggest piece of shit on earth. Quote me." Thank you Pink, I will.

*Kate Gosselin has been offered $400,000 to pose for Playboy. I propose that Hugh takes that money and offers it to Jon Gosselin to never speak in public ever again. I think it is time that Playboy does something good for the world and this is a win-win...because no one wants to see a mother of eights vajayjay — no one.

*Remember that neoprene number Ra'mon won with on Project Runway a couple weeks ago? (If not, you can check it out here.) According to Tim Gunn, who never lies or is wrong about anything ever so I totally believe him, the dress was dyed in the toilet at FIDM. Here is my that dye or 2000 Flushes? I won't judge but really, it's a legit question.

*Megan Fox has opened her mouth again. Calling Michael Bay, the mastermind behind such films as The Rock, Armageddon and apparently Playboy Video Centerfold: Kerri Kendall (who knew?!), "Hitler" and a "nightmare." His revenge?

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